i can go off the deep end

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by Owen_L_

by Owen_L_

so here I will be complaining about shit for no reason and/ or vnting.

I have 3 missing assignments and one F, (in the class where the assignments stem from) ((Haha that wasn't meant to be a pun but whatever)) and my mom disowns me right then and there

I haven't been eating that much anymore.

I came out as trans Friday night and my mom is accepting but I don't know if my dad is 100% on board. Actually, I don't know if either is 100% on board.

I will be postponing my suicide if I am able to transition with the money I will be collecting when I am 15 or 16 when I get a job.

I will be hoping that I can start my transition and if I can get my haircut around Christmas break b/c I want short hair. Maybe a longer crew cut if possible and if not a crew cut. maybe a well-blended fauxhawk? I dunno, maybe a mix.
(yes I know it's dead as winter but I don't care, this is a chance I get -maybe- and I'm going to take this shiiiiiizzznet.)

Uh, I have a Final on Wednesday and I feel as if imma pass with a C. That's the best expectation I have for myself.

I've leaked myself dry with my mind juice so all my stories and ideas have run dry.

Death Vally on my mind because nobody told me my national park thing is fuCKING DUE TOMORROW AND THEN I HAVE TO PUT IN A POWERPOINT TO HECKIN PRESENT ITT.

Mom cut me from weed for until after Chrismas.

I've had no life besides reading books in all of my spare time.

I feel as if I am losing my friends

I don't know what I am going to do for college or even for my career

I don't know if I will be able to function correctly for Christmas because my mother may or may not push me to come out to my grandparents or not, I don't know if she would like to keep it a secret. (possibly she's embarrassed by me transitioning or not) I don't know

I lost my lighter.

I did (some of) my homework for once tonight to end on a positive note.