Imaginary Friends

Grief

It was hard. Watching someone you love die. Yes, I love Johnny. I love all of them. They're all like brothers and sisters to me. 

I was debating staying home from school today but I decided to tough it out. I know my parents would let me stay home. I told them what happened and they said I could stay home. I told them I would think about it. But I knew if I were to stay home I wouldn't want to go back.

I pretty much dragged myself out of bed (more like couch since that's where I was sleeping last night) and around school. I was just going through the day with no emotions. I didn't eat anything last night or anything for breakfast and lunch. I wasn't happy, my friends could tell. I was sad and depressed. I was breaking. Tearing apart at the seams. I don't know how much longer I can keep pretending to be happy, pretending to be okay, pretending that everything is perfect.

I walked out of the school building and started my walk home. I could hear footsteps behind me. "Morgan!" I turned and seen my friends behind me.

I didn't want to talk. Today wasn't the day. I took off running to my house. I could here my friends calling after me, trying to stop me. I didn't turn around, I didn't stop. I could here them running after me but it only made me run faster.

I seen my house in the distance. I continued to run, not slowing down. I ran up the steps on the porch and inside the house. Once I was inside I slammed the door and locked it.

I heard footsteps coming down the stairs. It was Ponyboy. "Morgan, what's wrong? Why'd you slam the door?"

I didn't answer. I was breathing heavy. I felt light headed and dizzy. I sat down on the couch. Ponyboy could tell there was something wrong. He sat down beside me. "Hey, what's wrong?" I still didn't answer. I shut my eyes for a minute, and when I opened them I was fine again.

"Nothing, I just felt a little light headed," I told him.

"I'll get you some water." Pony got up and got me some water.

"Thanks," I mumbled when he returned with a glass.

I took a sip of the water—the cold liquid felt good in my dry mouth—and sat it down on the coffee table. I laid my head back on the back of the couch. "You all right?"

"Yeah, I'm good." But I'm not. Not at all.

"What happened exactly?"

"I ran home from school."

"Why?" I opened my mouth, about to say something else, when I heard a knock at the door.

"Morgan, we know you're home. Please answer. We're worried about you."

I didn't say anything. I wasn't going to answer. "You need to answer. They're your friends."

"No, I don't want to. They'll want to know the truth, but when I tell them they won't believe me. They'll think I'm crazy."

"No they won't. They're your friends, Morgan. If they don't believe you then you need to give them time to. They'll come around."

"Okay." I got up and answered the door. I seen my friends standing there with worried looks on their faces. They didn't say anything, they just walked right inside. Savannah grabbed my hand and dragged me with her. "What are you doing?"

"We're going to your room."

Once we got into my room they all made themselves comfortable. I sat on my bed with Maddy. Savannah and Jade stood up, leaning against my dresser. I felt weird sitting on my bed. I slept on the couch last night because I watched Johnny die and I seen his body fade away. And that all happened on my bed.

"Okay, what do you wanna know?"

"Why you've been so distant. Why you keep ignoring us when we try to talk to you."

"Well that's a long story. But you have to promise to believe me."

"Of course we'll believe you." I was glad. I just hope they'll keep that promise.