Untitled, 2018

Chapter 38: MakeUp

Jimin
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What was his name again? Gunho.
I narrowed my eyes at him as he bowed quickly and fled to the nearest room, closing the door behind him.

I looked back at Riti, only to realize she was slowly shrinking and trying to slip away, and had not taken my hand. I sighed and waved my hand in front of her again. She looked between me and my hand, before slapping it away and making a run for it. I groaned and ran after her.

"Riti, why are you running?" I hissed.
"Why are you following me?"
"I came to apologize!"
"I can't look at you right now!"

I very easily caught up to her (she's slow) and blocked her path, as she tried to dodge around me unsuccessfully.
"Why not?"
"Because! You heard what I said!"
"So what?"
She tried to duck under my arm or something, but I grabbed her by her shoulders as soon as she was hunched and close to me.
"Because!!" She stopped squirming and hung her head. "You hate me.. and I admitted that you were my favorite." I heard her breathe in shakily. "And you knowing it kinda hurts, dude."
I stood there in silence for a bit. I didn't know why but I felt like I was gonna tear up. "I'm sorry." I said. She must have heard the tone of my voice and immediately looked up, her concerned eyes looking a little red too.

The hallway we had just turned into was at the end, towards the exit, and completely empty, thankfully. Because my lips started trembling as I spoke, filled with emotion, "I'm really sorry. It's been a really tough month... a tough year." I felt my eyes brim with tears, and Riti looked at me in alarm, but I continued.

"I was stupid and stressed, and for once I was having fun and thinking I could trust someone. Thought I'd made a friend I could tell things I couldn't tell the members... because you know how it is. But—this is gonna sound stupid—the other day you said that you would do that for anyone, and I don't know why that just kept messing with me. I thought you didn't like me, had to put up with me, or were resentful and didn't see me as a friend." I realized I was rambling but now I felt a fat tear or two roll down my cheek.  "I'm so sorry. I'm just really stressed and—"

I saw her tears start showing too as she didn't let me finish and immediately hugged me tightly. "No please, it's fine.. it's fine, I get it. I said that because I felt too guilty about being around you. I didn't want to burden you, and I thought maybe," I felt her hesitation from her being buried in my jacket, "it's not my place to be close to you even if I wanted to be. I'm sorry I said that and made you think that way. I know it's been a hard year. For you more than me. Of course I get that, and... of course I like you. You're my favorite member, and you're now my good friend. You can rely on me, and I'll help you out with anything I can do. I promise." I couldn't help but start crying at that, and hugged her tightly as I felt her body twitch with sobs in my arms too.

When we both calmed down, I felt her pull away as she offered me a tissue from one of those tiny plastic things, laughing after looking at my face. I took a tissue and broke into a smile, feeling silly. She slapped my arm. "Your makeup is ruined, stupid."
I gasped as I remembered. I have a show to be at.

She chuckled, "No worries, I can fix it easily."
I took the extra tissue I'd pulled out and dabbed it on her face playfully. "You're a girl of many talents."
She snatched it from my hand and gasped indignantly. "Woman."

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She finished fixing up my makeup hastily once we'd snuck into our dressing room quietly. When she was done, she dabbed some eyeshadow on her own eyelids, with much more care, I might add. I groaned at that.
"So... I'm your favorite member, huh?"

She looked over at me, a smirk already playing at her lips again. "Uh huh, and 'These Americans'? I've defended you online and in-person to my friends enough that that's unfair."
I smiled and looked down, a little embarrassed.
"But..." she continued with a small voice, "I'm not gonna lie... my mom thinks you look like a girl..."
We looked at each other for a minute before bursting out into laughter. I shushed her between our fits of giggles, "Shh! My managers will get suspicious of they're outside."

I put on my blue jacket and ruffled my hair a little bit in the mirror. "By the way... what were you talking to that boy about? Was he... bothering you?"
I saw her stiffen a little as she thought about it. "No, it's not like that.. um, it's nothing. He just isn't a big fan of me after I got his upper manager demoted, I think."
I could tell she was holding something back, but I didn't want to push. Was he flirting with her? Harassing her? I shook my head. No way... right?

"I need to go back up. I've been gone far too long." I left the room, looking back only to see Riti in deep thought. But she turned around one more time to add a little, "By the way, that really was a really stupid reason to snap at me." I rolled my eyes playfully and waved goodbye. I made my way back up to the seating areas, where the members all looked at me with alarm. A chorus of "where were you?"s were whispered and I just responded that I was pooping. I sat next to Taehyung, and turned to whisper to him.
"I made up with Riti and apologized. We're good now. We're friends."
He turned to me, surprised, and patted my back with a big grin. "Well done, my boy." I rolled my eyes and laughed. But just then a silver head a few seats away caught my eye and I narrowed my eyes with suspicion.

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Earlier, Riti

BTS had only just gone up to perform as I snuck around trying to film them without being spotted by Jimin. I was EMBARRASSED ASF — he had heard me saying the cringiest things about him. Great. This has been a great f***ing day. First, my favorite guy insults me and pretty much directly lets on that he hates my guts. Next, I accidentally tell the same guy how much I love and admire him. Next, I can't stop imagining stupid scenarios, all of which end with me being ridiculed, pitied, ignored, fired, rejected. I wanted to scream.

I walked past the last dressing room and was half feeling like running to the parking lot and half gonna stab myself in the thigh with the nearest available sharp object— to distract from the now.
Instead I sat down by the door and played some loud stressful music in my earbuds. I assumed the room was empty since it was closed, but right then it opened and out came Mr. you-wouldn't-believe-it old Goatee, this time in a familiar janitor get-up. He looked at me with recognition and I groaned indignantly. "Why are you always here when things start getting messed up?"

"Hi, I remember you from my other contract janitor job," he said as he squatted down to my level.
"Yeah, yeah— all that nonsense. Why are you here?"
"Why wouldn't I be? I was hired." He showed me a plastic bag of trash in his left hand. "Besides, I'm wondering what you're listening to, when the music outside is so entertaining." He extended his right hand quickly and pulled one of my earbuds out before standing up and walking away quickly.
"Hey what the f—"
I assumed he was talking about the bass pounding in the building: BTS was performing Idol.

I sighed and pulled my other earbud out, straining my ears to try and tell what part of the song was playing currently. Instead, I immediately heard a cooing voice from the door that had been left ajar once the janitor had left.
"Becky~ I'm so glad you called."
Boi, I do not give a damn about your Be— my eyes fluttered open and alert. I stiffened and sat straight up. Baekie?