Innocence: Lost

Chapter Thirty-Two

"I'll never forget when I met Michael Clifford," Calum let out a soft noise. His eyes were puffy from all of the crying. He was standing behind a podium next to the large display for Michael.

"They asked me to do a speech. I'm not really good at words, but the fact that his family came to me and asked for me to do it—I appreciate that. I appreciate him and the life that he lived," He choked up at the last part.

Luke and Ashton had to pretend everything was fine between them. They sat with their hands interlaced. Luke only agreed to keep Ashton's secret if he kept his end of the promise.

The tan boy had to grip the podium. He locked eyes with the audience before clearing his throat.

"Yeah, he was wonderful," Calum laughed, "I met him when we were only sixteen years old. Michael Clifford taught me unconditional love. I was struggling in school, and he offered to help me. Every day, I'd go over to his house. I'd bike over because my parents wouldn't get me a car."

Everyone cooed. Calum shook his head and tried to keep going.

"And uh, sorry everyone," He wiped his eyes, "I was his first kiss. I was his first everything. I took him to prom. We bought matching necklaces, and every day he'd ask me to buy him a red carnation. Those little things changed me. He saved me from the path I was going down."

Those words hit Ashton hard. He didn't cry, but he thumbed over Luke's knuckles. Even if it were toxic, he needed it as much as Luke.

"That's the thing about Michael. Michael saved everyone. He would be hard. He'd get cold, but if you were falling, Mikey always caught you. I wish I could've told him how thankful I am. Thank you Mikey for trying to get me in rehab. Thank you, my darling. A-A-And I'm so damn sorry for how we ended," Calum was sobbing by now. His button down sleeves were all crumbled from his restlessness. He hadn't slept in four days.

Ashton looked at Luke.

"Please, I don't want to be like that," he whispered to the blonde. Luke swallowed a whimper.

"Stop, Ashton. I have my mind made up," Luke mumbled.

"Angel—" Ashton groaned. He was cut off by someone hushing him in the row ahead of them.

The funeral hall was so decorated so beautifully. Michael loved gold and white together. Calum picked out and paid for everything. Everything he did didn't feel like enough, though.

"Many of you probably know me from Mikey's many stories. I mistreated him. That's for sure. I left him countless times, yelled at him, and basically just stepped on his heart. No matter what, though, I never stopped loving him. Even when he walked out for good. When he slammed the door in my face and drove away. When he moved out of my home. He never left my brain," Calum rubbed his face. He drummed on the podium. His speech was being made up on the spot, and it showed how much he cared.

"Unfortunately, this time, there is no making up. He's gone, and I hope he knows that I loved him. If there is a heaven, my Michael is an angel, watching down on me."

Ashton pressed his nose to Luke's curls, sniffing the sweet scent that he loved. He kissed his temple and frowned.

"Don't ask me to kill you," He whispered. Luke still got chills just from gentle touches.

"I already have," Luke growled quietly. Ashton nosed behind Luke's ear.

"Then spend two more nights with me first. Come home with me. Just for two more nights," Ashton wiped Luke's wet eyes. The ceremony was already hard enough for him, but he had all the extra stress of keeping Ashton's secret on him.