BURNING TOUCH | mike faist

|lonely again - three|

     "PLEASE!" She begged me. I felt daja vu. We were doing the same song and dance that we did three months ago.
     "No! At the last party, I ended up staying outside anyway!" I retorted.
     "Well, yeah, but you met that cute guy, right?"
     "And?"
     "I invited him again."
I sighed.
     "Fine, I'll go."

________________________________________________________________________________

Pulling up to her house, I unlocked her door. There were a few people already, but Mike wasn't there. After a few hours, the party was actually getting started. Crowds of people showing up at her door, and another crowd accumulating everywhere else. I was overwhelmed by the noise and I thought I would have a panic attack. I made a mental note about telling my psychiatrist that my meds needed to be updated. I made my way to her bathroom to calm down, but of course, someone was using it. I went to the guest room and into the closet, unlocking her secret door. I walked up the stairs and entered her room, making my way straight to her bathroom. After taking 30 minutes to calm myself down, I made my way back to the party. 

After around 15 minutes of searching, I found Maggie and I suggested that we chill in her garden. She said she couldn't because she had to keep an eye on the party in case things get out of hand. I understood, of course, but it still kinda hurts that's she can't hang out with me.

Making my way through her beautiful gardens, I sighed and gazed. It's amazing how lucky she is to be living here, though I sleep over so much that it's almost as if I live here as well. 

I crossed her bridge, the one with the cherry blossoms trees framing each entrance and blue, purple, and pink lily pads covering the body of water that flowed beneath it. I stopped at the halfway point, the highest point on the bridge, and leaned over the cobblestone railing. I admired the small, calm river, the wind in the trees bringing me back to my senses.

I took a few deep breaths, breathing in the cool air. I was completely alone with my thoughts. I thought back to when I was a kid; memories of playing checkers and Parcheesi with my dad came flooding back, filling and clogging my head. Those times from before I was seven, when hope was high and life worth living. And then, he and my mom divorced. He moved away to California, and he took my childhood in his stride. I was no longer a seven year old with no worries or cares, I was a seven-year-old who had to provide emotional support to my mother. I was the caregiver. I miss being a kid.

     "Didn't expect to see you here," a voice said from behind me. I turned around, surprised by the voice taking me out of my thoughts.
     "Oh, hi, Mike," I said, fiddling with my fingers. He walked up to the railing I was against and leaned next to me.
     "I thought you said the last party would be the only party you'd attend," He said, gazing over the bridge at the river.
     "I guess I lied."

A soft wind blew by, shaking the leaves in the trees. We spoke for a little while longer, and a comfortable silence fell upon us. Until I broke it.

     "So, Mike, why do you come to these parties if all you do is just hang out here?" I asked him, looking into his eyes.
     "Well, Jake doesn't like to go to parties alone. What about you?"
     "Same thing with Maggie. She has to beg me to be here," I chuckled a little. Technically, I'm not ENTIRELY lying, I'm only... withdrawing the whole truth. He doesn't have to know that he's the only reason I'm here.
     "I guess we have something in common, then," He said with a slight smirk. I looked into his eyes for a brief moment.
     "I guess we do."