Diary Of An Archaeologist - Wattys 2019 Non-fiction Winner

That Time A Woman Drew Me Like One Of Her French Girls

Today, my story is a little bit different. You see as a student I started to model for art classes given at a museum near me to earn some extra money. Reason being, with my part-time job at that time I could barely make ends meet and modelling was pretty well paid so it sounded like a perfect deal.

Now, I never and will never model nude. I have immense respect for the models who do that because I just can't - I just can't!
Besides, the dressed models got to wear these amazing costumes. And you guys know by now that I am a sucker for a pretty costume.

The sitting still part of the job was something that I had to practice. Once you lock your body into a position for more than fifteen minutes you start to feel your muscles straining. Try not moving for thirty minutes and it will actually hurt if you're not careful. But after a while, I started to get the hang of it, and it became even easy after a year.

The fact that these art classes were given at a museum made it possible to take the class to the exhibition and show them certain art styles which then incorporate that style into the class. I would always join the class on this mini excursion, talk with the participants (all adults), and discuss with the teacher what kind of poses I would do.

This day we had the painter Breitner as our theme for that class and I was given a gorgeous kimono to put on because Breitner is known for his kimono girl paintings.

I absolutely adore his art and was super excited to pose in a kimono, but there was one tiny problem. The pose of the girl in the painting is impossible to hold for an extended period of time. Try it for yourself if you don't believe me, try that 90° degree angle with your back, it is painful.
Now, the teacher knew this and he used it as an opportunity to explain to the class that Breitner used to first photograph his models and use the photo as reference for his paintings, but since we had a live model we wouldn't do such intrigued poses today.
All the participants agreed and we started to walk back to the classroom.

As I made my way back one of the women approached me and asked; "could you do that pose of the last painting? I would love to paint that."

I politely explained to her that, that pose (the one in the image) is not one I would be able to hold for very long so I couldn't do that. She huffed and stormed off, leaving me a bit confused as to why she would ask such a question if the teacher had just explained that I couldn't do that. Anyway, I started putting on the kimono as the class was getting all their materials ready in the room next door and once I stepped on the little stage in the middle of the classroom the teacher started the class.

Not even 5 minutes in the same woman as before raised her hand. "Can she please take off that robe, I want to paint a nude model."

The teacher nearly choked on his coffee. "Miss, this class is about painting a dressed model like stated in the brochure. If you want to paint a nude model, you have to take another class."

Again, she huffed but didn't say anything so we continued the class. Everything went very smoothly in my opinion, most of my poses involved some props, like the one below, and the results were generally very good. Or so I thought...

As the class ended, I took a break and the teacher was walking around observing everyone's work. From his expression alone I could tell if a person's work was any good, without even seeing the painting. He would nod if he approved, smile if he was impressed, frown if someone had made an abstract interpretation and shake his head if he wished he was teaching the children's class again.

As he passed the huffing woman's easel, however, he gasped in shock and looked at me with such a bewildered look that I couldn't tell if he was impressed or shocked. She noticed him behind her and flaunted a smug grin as he announced loudly; "I would like to gift this piece to the model who so graciously posed for us. It's a shame we got to see so little."

I nearly fell from my chair when she showed me the painting. It was a nude woman, looking nothing like me, sprawled out beside a chair. It didn't look anything like my pose, nor did it look anything like me. The body was a mixture between Jessica Rabbit and Kim Kardashian but in dwarf size. Mind you, I'm 1,65 m (5,4 ft) which is considered short in the Netherlands, but I'm not that short nor that absurdly curvy.
I don't even understand how she could see anything sensual in me through that massive kimono. Your entire body, from the neck down to the ankles is just engulfed in layers upon layers of fabric. The only thing that is accentuated is your waist. Even your arms are swallowed up by the massive sleeves, it's hard to even make out where someone's elbows or knees are.

Everyone in the class was staring at me as I was struggling to form a coherent sentence. "Uhm, thank you. But you should take it with you, you worked so hard on it."

"No, I insist."

Oh boy, what was I lucky to get this perverted version of myself. After everyone had left, the teacher and I took a better look at this painting trying to figure out, why the hell she would make something like that in this class.
I'm an art fan, I don't mind nude images in art at all, but the idea that this woman pictured me in this way the entire time I was posing just made me extremely uncomfortable. I say it once again; I have mad respect for people who pose nude for art classes. The fact that they can deal with a bunch of strangers are staring at every part of you deserves all the praise. I did continue to model, even got some really pretty paintings of myself and met some really talented artists, but this woman spoiled wearing kimono's for me for quite some time.