unexpected ; yeonbin

six

soobin had woken up in the same bed, confused. he tried to rub his tired eyes but his hands were restricted to the bed, causing him to panic.

"hey, hey. don't do that. everything's okay." yeonjun was by his side in seconds.

"h-hyung. what h-happened?" the boy was frightened.

"you had a bit of a panic attack, love. everything's okay now." the older boy held soobin's hand, knowing how to calm him.

the door to the room opened and stood there was the doctor, another man, and soobin's parents.

"baby, my god. stop scaring us like that." his mother cried. soobin immediately felt guilty.

"soobin, we're gonna leave you to talk to our psychiatrist, doctor min. we'll be back to talk to you later, okay?" doctor kim spoke. soobin looked terrified.

"h-hyung, can you stay?" soobin asked shyly before turning to the doctor. "p-please, can he stay? please?" the younger boy pleaded. the doctor turned to look at his parents who nodded. the doctor nodded aswell before leaving the room.

as soon as the door shut, the psychiatrist took a seat the opposite side of the bed from yeonjun. "so, soobin-ssi, i'm doctor min. please don't be afraid to speak about this. if it makes you feel any better, i can ask questions, and you can give me answers." doctor min suggested, soobin nodding his head.

"how long have you been feeling down, and having suicidal thoughts?" soobin cringed at the first question before answering simply. "nearly a year." the doctor was writing on the clipboard.

"okay, can i ask why you did it? did something traumatic happen to make you feel like this was the best way?"

soobin fidgeted with his hands, feeling yeonjun's on his. "it's okay, love. tell him what you told me."

"nothing traumatic happened. i-it was just my brain." soobin answered the best way he could think.

"i see. do you hear voices? or see things?" soobin shook his head 'no' in response. "that's good then."

"when you say it was just your brain, do you feel like the smallest of things make you feel down?" soobin nodded, still looking at yeonjun's hand on his.

"can you describe to me how you would feel on a normal day?" doctor min asked patiently, observing the boy.

"i'd feel fine. i don't know. s-sometimes, i just get really triggered, and start thinking this w-way."

"okay i'm going to ask you some yes or no questions, if it's easier." the doctor spoke gently as he flipped the page on his clipboard. "have you had loss of appetite, or overeating?"

soobin nodded.

"have you had difficulty concentrating, in class for example?"

soobin nodded.

"have you had feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, hopelessness or pessimism?" to that, soobin nodded.

"have you had trouble sleeping, or oversleeping?" once again, the young boy nodded. his eyes shifting to look at yeonjun every now and again.

"have you had loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies?" soobin nodded, feeling yeonjun squeeze his hand in reassurance. he felt as if this session was dragging too long.

"have you been persistently sad, anxious, or having "empty" moods?" the boy kept nodding.

"restlessness and irritability?" he nodded.

"i'm going to ask you a few more, and then i'll leave you to it, okay?" soobin bit his lip, and nodded.

" have you had disconnected and very fast thoughts?" soobin nodded.

"inappropriate elation or euphoria?" soobin shook his head 'no' this time.

"inappropriate irritability?" soobin looked at doctor min, "kind of." he quietly responded.

"increased sexual desire?" soobin blushed at the question, avoiding eye contact with both yeonjun and the doctor, hearing a soft chuckle escape yeonjun's lips as he shook his head 'no'.

"okay, that's pretty much it. for the next few weeks, i'd like you to come see me at least once. stay strong soobin-ssi. keep fighting." the doctor smiled before standing up and leaving the room, exchanging 'goodbye's to the other two.

as soon as he had left the room yeonjun looked at soobin, a small smile on his face.

"that wasn't so hard, was it?"

"no but i hate talking about me."

"it's just to make you better, love. i'll never leave your side." yeonjun smiled, pulling soobin into him for a hug.

"i think you lied about the last question." soobin looked up before pulling away.

"h-hyung." his eyes were wide, an obvious blush on the younger's cheeks.

"did you tell the truth binnie?" yeonjun raised an eyebrow.

"it was just one question, hyung. i doubt it'll make a difference." soobin looked at his hands, his cheeks heating up again. yeonjun placed his hand under soobin's chin, "look at me, love."

soobin did, his eyes flickering from each of yeonjun's beautiful ones, down to his lips, in a  triangular motion. neither boy realised how close their faces were. just inches apart. the feeling of need and want present in the both of them. just a small kiss wouldn't hurt, right?