Pick Your Poison

Chapter 4

Hey friends. I understand it has been an incredibly long time since I touched this story. Two years? I feel guilty for even having to say that. When I got back into writing I still loved this plot. I always have. I find it to be original as I've never seen something else like it. I love MerDer and I love this story. I want to keep sharing it with you all.

If you don't remember this picks up in the future. Each chapter goes back and forth. We are still doing the year 2017 even though it is 2019 now. If you could do me a huge favor and please leave a review it would mean the world to me. Reviews are the best way to ensure quick updates as they are always inspiring and wonderful.

If you're reading this, thank you for taking the time to support MerDer. Now on with the chapter.

March 12, 2017

Derek let nearly two months slip by and still no reciprocation to the Alcoholics Anonymous organization. He ignored, stalled, and pushed aside the event for as long as humanly possible. It's what Derek did when a crisis tumbled to his path and he had no earthly notion how to overcome it.

Derek ran. He, alongside all the other Shepherd's, were runners.

A piece of him wanted to be strong enough to reply with a yes and divulge a heartfelt speech to thousands of individuals at a banquet. But he couldn't. In hindsight Derek wasn't strong enough to placate a brave expression to an audience when his insides were crumbling. Getting healthy meant absolutely nothing if Derek couldn't have Meredith Grey.

They flooded his voicemail perpetually, begging that Derek return their calls. Even if the answer was no the least he could do was find the decency to announce it. His brain was cognizant of the answer he wanted to say. Delivering a speech of that nature would trigger him and possibly bring him back down to a drunken stupor each night.

So why was it this damn difficult to pick up the phone and say it?

Maybe he was being in denial about his actual feelings toward the event. Derek was proud of himself for getting sober and there was this piece lodged down under that possibly itched to be relinquished. But he couldn't do it. No matter how many times Mark insisted or Addison bellowed.

Not without Meredith.

The air outside was crisp. A refreshing blast of near springtime air curled against his skin. The wind whipped and rattled his ebony locks. A louder slam made a pronounced echo across the woods. An adjacent slam followed his and Derek watched while Mark escaped his black Porsche.

"Why the hell are we here?" Mark moaned.

Derek reached into the trunk for the poles and bait. "To fish." He stated with a simple smirk. He locked his SUV and the two of them made a stride for the familiar dock.

When Derek moved to Seattle at the beginning of his internship, this piece of land was found by mistake. He was drunk, per usual of the time, and needed a quiet place to decompress. After hiking the majority of the day with Mark, Derek stumbled across these gorgeous acres. He was met with an abandoned airstream trailer. Derek resided in that thing for years. He recently bought the land when becoming financially stable enough to do so and planned to have a house built here sometime in the future.

A manifold of memories were made just below his feet. Derek's heart swelled with pain.

"You're obsessed with this place." Mark sighed. His tackle box clanked against the fishing rod as they shuffled through the moist grass. "Do you realize how many lakes there are in Seattle? We don't have to take an hour drive out here to catch some damn fish."