Chapter 1- Jade

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Senior year is here...Fuck!

I can't handle the thought as I slurp down the hot coffee in my hand, letting the warmth coat my throat and fill my stomach. I'm trying to nurse my hangover that I achieved from getting shitfaced with my two best friends last night, who are still unconscious and sprawled out in the living floor. I'm out on our screened balcony with the door shut and I can somehow still hear Carlie's snoring.

I'm reluctant that I'm up before 10am, but even with all the shots of whiskey I downed and vodka I chugged, the thought of my MCAT scores waiting to be released and my med school application opening in a few weeks won't leave my mind. Kara and Carlie knew I've been stressed...Hell, I'm been stressed since my freshmen year about applying and getting accepted into medical school. You wouldn't think a girl like me would want to go to medical school after being scarred from all the ER visits in my childhood. But after so many times of my father breaking a part of my mom and her lying to the doctors who knew right away it was abuse, I realized I wanted to be on the other end trying to fix...save lives. I memorized the Hippocratic Oath before I was 18, but I felt it was ironic that I was relieved, almost happy when my mom died before just before graduation. It destroyed me knowing that she wouldn't see me walk at graduation, nor see me walk at college graduation, or even receive my medical degree, but after 18 plus years of abuse I assume, I was happy he wouldn't touch her again.

He didn't get the chance to touch me. As soon graduation was over, which he didn't even attend because he was too bent on drinking his mundane life away, I packed up my shit and moved to Florida. I applied to an internship the summer before fall semester and with the help of my mom's loving sister, I was able to pay for my expenses until my student loans kicked in. That was the same internship that landed me on becoming best friends with Kara. We both declared ourselves as Health majors and were working with the public health department to improve the community outreach programs. It wasn't until fall semester that we met Carlie. Somehow we ended taking the same freshmen Critical Thinking and Reasoning course and after the first personality test, Carlie and I shot up our hands declaring that we had the same personality type. It only took a few days before the three of us to become inseparable and attended all the fun parties and clubs. Not trying to arrogant but with two hot, slender blondes and a busty brunette, who would say no to us at the entrance?

"Motherfucker" I hear Carlie growl. I hear the end table screech across the living room floor and see Carlie pull open the door to the balcony get a wave of heat hit her face. "Fuck" she says. She staggers to the other patio chair next to me and places a hand over her face covering her leftover makeup and running a hand through her matted hair. "You okay?" I grin. "No...I ran into the fucking end table as I got up and all I want to do is vomit. Fix me doc!" she whines. "I told you...or at least I think I remember telling you not finish that bottle..." "Yeah...I don't remember you telling me that or at least helping me to vomit in the bathroom versus my own handbag...which by the way is where?" "I took your wallet out and threw out the bag" I say. Surprise, surprise...vomit didn't bother me after all those years having a drunk and abusive dad.

"Shit, I'm sorry doc! But thanks for saving my ass or at least my bag...Now where's the Excedrin and is the coffee still hot?" she says. "Coffee is hot and Excedrin is in the cabinet above the stove as usual." "Thanks doc, you're a life-saver." She's the only one that calls me doc and I find it endearing. Though Carlie has no interest in medicine and can't stand the sight of blood she gave me the nickname after she told me she would design my office. Carlie was number one in the interior design program at Brooksville University. She scored amazing internships every summer just like the one she just completed in New York with a firm. This girl was on a face track to success minus her inability to hold down her liquor after a certain point. But I loved her and she begged me to apply to several programs in New York in hopes of staying close after graduation...Fuck! Less than one year and we'll all be graduating.

"Bitch" the door opens and Kara's pale face and long blonde hair hangs over her slumped body between the door and the door frame. "Yes" I gruffly respond. "I think change my mind about us going on this retreat...why the fuck did I get us into this?" "Oh, no you don't. You were the one that made me and Carlie commit to this shit. You were the one that said if I joined this senior mentor program it would look good on my application—" she interrupts me "Damn, I'm sorry...I'm just not in the mood of driving 3 hours to some cabin, ugh!" She walks away and slams the door which does not help either of our hangovers.

Though Kara was a health major like me, she decided to make her emphasis on health education so she could work in community centers, health departments or in school systems. She thought that if she got involved with the senior mentor program that focuses on helping freshmen acclimate to college life it would look good on her resume. But of course she didn't want to do it alone, so she convinced Carlie and me to do it. I have no idea what was in it for Carlie but I think more or less Carlie didn't want to miss out on us spending time together.

I stood up from my chair and a wave of nausea hits me. I grip the arm of the chair and suck in deep breathes in hope of not vomiting on the balcony floor. After a few minutes of pushing the nausea back down my throat I walk into our A/C apartment. "Alright ladies" I mumble "So who's driving to this retreat?"

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