Fucked up teens poetry

Youness

I like to think I'm over you.

I think if other people.
I dance with other people.
I laugh with other people.

But when your in the room all I can think about is you.
The ache in my chest.
The sparks of loneliness that has turned into a regretful obsession in which you have caged me in and bolted the windows and doors.

It's a suffocating feeling knowing I made the right choice but still hating it.
To continue to crave and wonder and long for something I gave up on and tossed away so easily and carelessly. Only after understanding the consequences.

To miss but not regret is a cruel oxymoron where I find myself contemplating everything.

You.
You.
You.

You the fucking boy that made 5 months turn into a lifetime.
You the fucking boy who made me feel shit I despise and cherish.
To make me long to go back but just want to forget.

I miss you.

But to let go I have to forget about you. 

But then we talk and you makes me laugh.
When the conversation finishes I want to cry because I won't be able to text you to continue it.
I won't be able to start it up randomly.
I won't be able to.
I stripped that privilege from myself.
I just sit there and let my soul suffer from your kindness.
Your Youness 

I still kinda miss my ex. But I can never get back with him because everyone knows that won't go well.
So I wrote a poem instead.
My instagram- fucked_up_teens_poetry
Artwork credit-soniapusey
(Btw this is just a lil side note.
When I was editing this I kinda realised that 'youness' is a weird word and I can't think of any other way to spell it but it's pronounced you-ness.
Lmao that's so random but so's my life atm and idgaf