A Howl in the Night

~ The Pursuit

"Xavier, wait!" I call after him, racing into the vast underbrush. I know that I have no chance of catching up with him unless he wants me to, but I couldn't live with myself if I didn't even try. No one knows more than I about how large the world can be when you feel so alone and vulnerable.

"Please!" Tears form in the corners of my eyes, dripping down my cheek and lips. Within this desperate pursuit, I can't help but feel a variety of intense emotions. The most predominant of these is a strange form of affection that cannot be easily described as desire or simple amity. I want to absorb his sadness, take in every negative emotion so that his pain will fade away. And the strangest thing is, there is no personal gain involved. I will get nothing of value out of consoling him.

But I still want to. And that fact scares and enthralls me beyond measure.

"Mona." Strong hands encircle me from behind, trapping me in the place I desired most. His body heat surrounds me, his shoulders lightly shaking. His voice is pained and his grip emulates that same feeling. In confusion, I look down at the ground to see a red splotch of blood.

"It stops here." Xavier says, his tone heavy. His face lowers and rests on my shoulder, his eyelashes fluttering against my ear. "The blood stains disappear. I... don't sense him at all."

I let him embrace me, closing my eyes and immersing myself in him. As I do so, that same affection grows to consume my entire body until I can't help but accept some form of it. Turning so that I face him, I place both hands on his cheeks and lean forwards.

There is no logical reasoning. I guess you could say that it was because he saved me. Or maybe because of his ways of persuasion. But to me, there is no process. It just happens—or maybe it happened already, and I just didn't know it—without warning, without hope for recovery, and without obligation.

I love him. Maybe since day one, maybe not until this very moment. But all I know now is my own realization, and I'm never going to let it go.

My heartbeat escalates as his head leans closer to my neck. His breathing is heavy with fear and exhaustion. I can't stop myself from stroking his hair with my fingertips, and wondering if things will ever get any better.

"Xavier, I know how you feel, perhaps more so than anyone else," I sigh, rubbing his back slowly. "But you haven't been getting any sleep, and it shows. Come with me and rest."

He doesn't move, but his grip loosens. I gently twist out of his embrace and instead reach for his hand. His palm feels warm and clammy as he gingerly closes his fingers around mine. A strange expression appears on his face as he squeezes my hand.

I take a step towards our camp. Noticing that he is barely moving, if at all, I cast a glance at him inquisitively. He seems rooted in place, thinking about something intently.

"Xavier?" I ask inquisitively, casting a glance at our still interlocked hands. And then we make eye contact, his gaze scaring me with its intensity.

"I don't need rest," he insists, pulling on my arm so that I am forced to turn around. "I just need you."