A new kind of hell

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Shes been at the hospital for about a week now. Its a new kind ofo hell, instead of being in her own personal hell, shes also in the hell of this hospital and its slowly killing her also. She refuses to fight, she still hasnt seen her parents and shes falling deeper and deeper into her depression. refusing to take meds and them having to be forced down her throat pretty much. Nothing is actually helping her, she doesnt want help. She just wants to die... she keeps hoping that the hospital will just give up. Hoping they might decide life isnt for everyone and just kill her and end it all. She doesnt wanna live and why cant they realize that. She keeps telling herself she's never gonna get better. She doesn't even actually wanna get better. They keep telling her its gonna get better but she never believes them, because they lie to her. Everyone lies to her. She looks over and see's a pair of sissors on the counter so she gets up and walks over to the counter weakly and grabs them she makes it over to the bed before she hears the nurse down the hall, she shoves them under her pillow and she comes in to check up and make sure shes okay and that everything seems right. The moment the nurse leaves Jessica starts counting to 30 to make sure that the nurse is gone and then she removed the bandages and takes apart the sissors and grabbed the sharpest piece and sticks into her skin and felt that feeling again. The feeling that all her pain was going away watching the blood drip down her wrist she got both sides. Her heart starts to race and the monitor went insane. This is it she thought finally its done its all over. No more doctors, nurses, therapists or parting who pretend to care when its too late. She feels a real smile on her face for the first time in years. ITS FINALLY OVER. She doesnt have to deal with anymore life is over. Finally shes dead. But before the monitor could go flat there were nurses there trying to stop the bleeding they started succeeding and Jessica started failing again.

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⏰ Last updated: Sep 17, 2014 ⏰

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