tj| vi: better off

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i am such a dick. i can't believe i did that. cyrus trusted me and i pushed it in his face.

"good job kippen, now we know we can trust you." the basketball team walk over to the swings. i quickly wipe my face and walk away, i can't deal with them right now.

everything went wrong.

i left rose on his locker, because that's what friends do. i left it because he had been having a shitty morning. i left it to make him happy. i didn't want to out him - i wasn't even sure he was gay. and now he's told me he is gay, and that he's struggled with this? what does that make me? a monster. a cold-hearted monster. no one could ever love you. he was right. and what breaks my heart is that i know what he's going through (under different circumstances) and i let it happen. he's been struggling with his sexuality, having no one to turn to.

he's better off without me anyway. you know what they say... toxic tj kippen.

i walk back home, the sun still shining. i can't believe i've done this to cyrus. i turn on my vinyl player and climb on top of my covers, staring at my ceiling. the lyrics to 'here comes the sun' by the beatles played around my room. this always reminded me of my mom. even though she left and sad some pretty shit stuff, i do miss the happy moments. the moments like when she first taught me how to ride a bike, when she first took me to the park, our first look picnic.

let him cool down, then try talk to him, try explain about the situation. he always forgives. but you've really done it this time.

////////// meet alex the timeskip

monday had soon rolled around and i dreaded walking into the school. it's got to be worse for cyrus though.

"tj stop moping around and get your ass out of my car! you're the one that caused this, imagine how scared cyrus must be feeling. you did all this just for those jerks." i nod my head and get out the car.

"you don't know the full story."
"then tell me."
"tonight..." i head towards the entrance, occasionally getting a few cheers, a lot of people however diverted their eyes. i smugly wall down the halls, i have to. they're here.

i spot cyrus as his locker, along with jonah, his eyes meet mine for a split second. next thing, they were both gone. this was gonna be one hell of a day.

i walked into history and sat next to lester. he's not all that bad, he just goes along with everything because he doesn't wanna get on the wrong side of reed. i can tell he feels bad for cyrus, he likes the guy. i scan the rest of the room, their eyes linger on me. i see reed sitting at the back of the class with my 'girlfriend' not that i actually care. "it doesn't bother you at all does it." i shake my head and he lets out a sigh. "don't get hung up over what happened, cyrus will come around he adores you teej, he was willing to ditch his best friends for you on costume day, which you fucked up."

"not the only time i fucked up..."

"what do you mean? what did you do?"

"i asked to meet him at the spoon, to hang out but i had work and i had to stand him up and kinda ended up ignoring his messages, and he got upset. its sorted now though, except i've gone and ruined it again."

"what is it with you?" lester smirks slightly. i shake my head and we get on with the lesson.

////////

we made it to lunch, everything was slowly dying down, thankfully. which is what i thought, before i entered the cafeteria. there were whispers and stares. non directed at me however, all towards cyrus who sat next to jonah face red.

i have had enough. i walk to the nearest table and stand on top of it, ignoring lesters failed whispers for me to get off, muttering how unhygienic it was.

"everyone listen up!" i shout loudly, gaining the attention of everyone, all of them eager for what i had to say on the matter. "can you all mind your own business! there are bigger problems in life that whether someone is gay or not, whether that girl likes that guy. grow up and get lost. leave cyrus alone. anyone who has a problem comes to me." i ball my hand in a fist and get down off the table, walking to get some food with lester, people parting to let us get across and cutting queues.

i won't let cyrus get hurt anymore, i'm gonna fix this.

roses bite - tyrusWhere stories live. Discover now