Advice

one

Baz

I lay in Simon's bed, he was still sleeping, everything was so calm, all to errupt when his ex and penny's best friend, Agatha Wellbelove, where to bombard the house. I traced my fingers over the freakles on his chest, some I could connect to form constellations, I named them once while we where being idiotitic, I traced the one I called the medium dipper, I kissed his cheak to wake him up, his eyes fluttered open and he smiled turning around to face me. "Hello snow," I said smirking, "Bazilton." He said in response, we both started laughing. There was a knock at the door, I cursed who ever it was for ruining the peaceful atmosphere. Simon got up and put a shirt on, "No need to dress up." The knocking continued.He glared at me and leaned over the bed to kiss me on the forehead. He opened the door to see penny with her arms folding looking like a homicide may take place. "Agatha is getting here at ten, it's now eight, and the apartment is an absolute mess. Make yourselves useful and clean." She said throwing a cloth at Simon and a different one at me. "Especially you Simon, she's sleeping in your room so get ready to leave."
"I'm not leaving til tonight!" He shouted as she walked away, "Whatever!" She shouted back,"the skirting boards are a travesty and it's going to take me hours to clean them."
"I don't think she'll notice the skirting boards." I said to Simon as he got a bag from his wardrobe.
"You know penny, she's basically just a fourty year old house wife."
"Just leave that til later." I said, crawling deeper into my pillowfort.
"Well I just want to hide some stuff in case she goes looking about, plus I can start moving things over."
"Ah yes, the move in!"
"The move in!" He repeated.
Simon and I have been dating for just over a year now, and I finally asked him to move in.
"This is going to be so awkward."
Two hours later after cleaning the fridge and top shelves that I can even reach, penny got a text.
"Shit, she's outside. I haven't even begun to tackle the medicine cabinet."
I put on the kettle and sat on the worktop, "I don't think she'll be looking in the medicine cabinet." I said, stealing a price of Simon's toast, "Just ask you starvo." I smiled with a mouthful of toast, there was a knock at the door and penny rushed to get it. "Agatha!" She shouted hugging the blonde tightly. "Hi penny." She said. Penny grabbed her bags and brought them in, "Care to help boys?"
"Not particularly." I said taking another bite of toast.
"Boys? Who else is-" Agatha walked in and stopped once she saw me.
"What are you doing here?"
"Free food." She didn't look me in the eye, after she basically told me she loved me I did the thing most girls hate, got into a committed relationship with her boyfriend. "Hello Simon." She said, Simon got up and hugged her quickly, "Nice to see you. You look well." He said, this time he didn't look her in the eye. Sensing the tension penny brought her over to the sofa, talking her ear off about University. I walked over to Simon who was making four cups of tea. "Are you ok?" He smiled, "Always when I'm with you." I laughed, "Gay." Simon hit me up the head, "Penny he's abusing me!" I shouted
"Call childline or something." Agatha looked over with a confused expression, "what's going on?"
"Simon's evil." I said matter of factly as I retrieved some blood from the fridge, although I much preferred fresh blood, we came to the conclusion that me going out in the middle of the night in London was a horrible disission. So we bought blood from a butcher and that's what I drank.
"But you love me don't you?" Simon said leaning on my shoulder, "I guess so. How could I not?"
"Stop flirting for one second and bring me my tea!" Penny shouted, Agatha was still looking at us strangely, she quickly turned around when she saw I was looking at her back.
"What's wellbelove's problem?"
"Probably that she was in love with you and dating me, also I didn't tell her we're dating so she's probably a bit eiffy."
"What?" I shouted.
"Shut up Baz. How am I ment to tell my ex I'm dating the guy she left me for?" I glared daggers at him.
"Fine." I said, giving in to his sad eyes, "You're lucky I love you but I'm not acting differently, if anything I'll act even more lovey dovey."
I brought over the tea and set it on the coffee table. Penny grabbed hers but agatha was weary.
"I didn't poison it, plus Simon made it so don't worry." She let out a nervous laugh and picked up her tea, although she didn't drink it.
"How's America?" Simon asked as he sat next to me, his legs drapped over my knees.
"Good, so different though, I saw someone microwave tea in a cafe a few months ago. I can't get the image out of my head."
"Sounds blasphemous." I said leaning my head agenst Simon's shoulder.
"I always wanted to go to America." Simon said to me.
"Yeah because they'd love us wouldn't they?" Simon nodded, "everyone loves me, especially you." I shook my head, "that's gay, snow." Agatha looked up from her tea in horror, "You can't say that Baz! It's really offensive."
I looked at her in utter shock.
"Excuse me?"
"My friend Barry, well he's gay and he hates when people say that."
"Alright, Barry isn't here right now so, let me call Simon gay and get over it."
Wellbelove put down her tea and folded her arms, ending the conversation. Penny, sensing the tension changed the subject, She talked about the place we're going for dinner and how last time we where there Simon spilt curry on his shirt and how not even magic could get it out. Not a particularly funny story because she left out the part when she found the shirt on the pavement five streets away because while me and Simon where making out it flew out the window and landed there.

Simon

We got a good seat in the restaurant, Agatha was obviously annoyed Baz was joining us, it was awkward but she was only here for a few days, and honestly was happy I was staying with Baz, spending the night at his is amazing, no roommate to judge us for ordering pizza and cookies at four AM. I hoped she didn't go through my stuff but if she did she'd only find out about me and Baz which I don't care if she knows, I just didn't want to be the one tell her in fear of being slapped. I slid into the booth next to Baz. I grasped his hand under the table and gave it a quick squeeze. "So Simon," Agatha said,"What are you thinking?" I picked up a menu and read the first few items and set it back down loosing interest. "Probably just the roast." Baz hit my arm and drew my attention to the desert menu, "They have it again." He said, everyone but agatha knew what he was talking about, when we just moved here and went to this restaurant for the first time, we all got a brownie that was heavenly, the best in the world, then they changed the menu and haven't had it since, it's surprisingly a common topic amoung us.
"We have to." Penny said, "I'm getting one for myself."
"I think the magic is in sharing it."
"Yeah well you two love birds can share, I'm having my own."
"What are you talking about?" Agatha asked.
"Brownies." Baz said matter-of-factly. "What's so special about a brownie?"
"After we just moved here we got it between us and it disappeared off the menu, that was like a year ago."
We got our food and began to eat, penny asked agatha if she was dating anyone, I wasn't listening I was watching Baz who had a bit of gravy on this cheek and it was reaĺy distracting me.
"What about you, Simon?" I made a surprised noise, "are you seeing someone?" Agatha repeated, Baz looked at me and a silence followed, me and Baz had a full conforsation with out talking,
Are you going to tell her?
I don't know should I?
I don't care it would kinda funny not going to lie
Don't be a dick
Do it do it do it
Thought you didn't care
Pussy
Dick head for fucking gravy on your cheek dumbass.
Baz wiped his cheek and got the gravy off giving me an angry glare, keep in mind this took place over three seconds of agonizing silence I turned back to agatha and let out a nervous laugh, becoming deeply interested in my potatoes.
"Well? I won't be jealous, who is she?"
"No one, it's more of a casual thing." Agatha smiled, "At least you're happy." She turned to Baz with a less friendly smile, "and you?"
"No one," Baz said mimicking me. He shot me a look which I could only interprate as you're dead.
"Really, I would have thought you'd have a nice girl by now. You seem to have grown out of your plotting to kill Simon phase."
"And? What has that got to do with anything?"
"Well I always sorta suspected you where covering up that you liked him." I laughed, not because it was one hundred percent true, but because she didn't know that it was the same for me.
"If you thought that why did you ask me out?"
"You asked him out?" I asked, Baz never told me.
"Breifly."
"How do you breifly ask someone out? Where we together?"
"No we wern't! Don't worry Baz turned me down, said we'd never work out."
"Good. I would have killed him. But that would have never happened anyway." I said laying my head on his shoulder.
"Why not? Am I that ugly?" Agatha said laughing.
"No you aren't ugly, it's because anything he did I hated."
Penny tried not to laugh and failed miserably, "So that's all I am? Something Simon "did". Not like we ever did anything."
Everyone went quiet. Of course we all knew why we never did anything with my whole secretly pining for my roommate situation and of course everyone knew that we didn't so it didn't come as a surprise.
But agatha regretted saying what she did.
"I'm sorry that was out of line."
"No shit." I say getting up, "I'm getting some air."
Baz followed after me.
We stood outside, it wasn't awkward I was just embarrassed. Baz lit a ciggerate and offered me one, regrettably I took it. Fuck it I'm already living longer than I thought I would.
"Atleast you're staying at mine tonight." Baz said breaking the silence.
"Almost ours." I was excited to move in, penny was amazing but I needed to be with Baz, maybe start a family one day.
He squeezed my hand and took the last breath from his ciggerate, "almost ours."