princess / hamliza

5 / wedding day

( i'm sorry i have very little knowledge on how weddings like these work bear with me )

The next three days seemed to have passed by a lot faster than the rest had. I don't know why. Probably because I'm dreading this wedding. It's too late now to do anything about it. If there was more I could do, believe me, I would do it. But there wasn't. So... I just have to suck it up and get on with it.

I'm woken up earlier than usual by a few of my maids, they help to get me ready for the 'big day'. I don't consider it big, honestly. To me, it's not exciting in any way, it's not 'the start of a lifelong journey' as I've heard Angelica day. It's just... I don't know. I wish I could be as happy about my wedding as all my sisters were about theirs. But they actually liked the people they were marrying. Me? well... I just consider John an acquaintance, or maybe a friend. Nobody that I would think to marry if I had a say in it.

My maids help me into the wedding dress that all my sisters had worn after my mother. Itms a tradition for us to wear it. The dress is adorned with jewels and all sorts of sparkly stuff. It's beautiful. After the dress is fitted onto me, I'm sat down so that they can do up my hair and do my makeup.
"Are you excited, Miss?" one of them ask, looking at me with a grin. She's clearly more excited than I am.
"...Of course. Who wouldn't be excited?" I say, trying to sound at least a little enthusiastic.
"You're right," She says as she braids my hair, "Are you nervous at all?"
To answer honestly, yes. I'm terrified. From today onwards, my life will never be the same. I'll be married to a guy who I have to share a life with, who I have to start a family with... and I don't even love him in the slightest.
"Of course not. I'm excited... This is my wedding day. It's a happy day," I mutter, sighing before falling silent. I don't know how long I can keep this act up for.

Half an hour or so later, they're done. I see myself in the mirror, and I do look amazing. That I can happily say. My mother's dress looks good as new, my hair is decorated with flowers and such.  I can't help but crack a smile as I imagine walking down the isle like this towards Alexander. I wish that that's how this day would go. If I were marrying Alexander I'd definitely be way more excited.
"Do you like it, Miss?" One of the other maids ask. I turn to her and smile, nodding my head.
"I don't think I've ever looked better," I smile, holding my hands.

And then, before I know it, I'm being escorted down the aisle. I'd be able to appreciate all the decor if it weren't for the situation I was in. I walk down a pure white carpet, leading up to an arch which has lilies and other beautiful flowers weaved in and out of it. The sun shines brightly through the stained glass windows, making the whole place look more vibrant. There are decorations all over the place, making the whole setting look more beautiful and magical than I ever would've imagined. I try to keep my eyes up and on John as I walk down the aisle, trying to keep on my facade and pretend I'm happy to marry him.

As I stand beside him whilst the priest speaks, I do my best to hold back my tears. He holds my hands, and I try to keep a smile on my face as we look at each other, but... it's hard.
And soon enough, he says those two words.
"I do,"
and not long after that, I'm expected to say the same thing. I don't mean to hesitate, but the words seem to get caught in my throat. I glance around, before looking back at him and say,
"I do..." a little quieter than I'd hoped to say it, but at least I actually got the words out.

"You may kiss the bride!" The priest says enthusiastically. I wish I could be that happy about this. John gently grabs my waist and pulls me closer to him before pressing his lips against mine. I can tell he's passionate, I wish I was. Reluctantly, I kiss him back, and then I pull away. Poor guy. He's actually happy about all of this, his smile when he looks at me is full of real joy.
"Are you ready for us to start our lives together?" He whispers to me. I nod before looking out to our audience, my mother is stood there with my father, a huge grin plastered to both of their faces. The same with my sisters, and all the rest of my family. His family is here too, they have the same smile.
Funny how everybody but me is so happy about this marriage.

Soon we walk onto the balcony, and I can see and hear the whole kingdom cheering as our marriage is officially announced to them. We wave to them, and I try to keep an eye out for Alexander. Unfortunately, I can't see him anywhere. But I keep the fake smile on my face.
We go back inside before the party starts. My father has organised a ball for us to celebrate, with all the guests and a few surprise visitors here. As John and I walk in I can spot a few of my old friends who I haven't seen for years. Like Maria, god I've missed her! I wasn't able to attend her wedding, but I'm sure she understood. And my other friends, Polly and Martha are here! I last saw those two a few months ago. Wow. At least there's a few highlights to this wedding, huh?
I let go of Johns hand and make my way over to Maria, waving at her as she notices me. We both grin and hug each other tight before I pull away.
"Maria! God, it's good to see you! So sorry I couldn't make it to your wedding, how have you been?" I asked.
"It's all good, Betsey! I'm just happy I get to see you now! You look amazing. Oh! And I should tell you- James and I are expecting! Isn't that great?!" She says with a grin, I hug her again and laugh.
"Yes! Yes that's amazing!" I exclaim as I pull back. "Any names in mind?"
"Susan! If it's a girl. James wants to name it James jr if it's a boy. But I'd like to name it Francis."
I smile at her, clapping. "Beautiful names! Send me a letter when they're born, I'd love to come and visit." I say, I turn around as I feel a tap on my shoulder. It's Martha!
"Liza!" She exclaims, hugging me tight. "This wedding is amazing! I hope you'll be happy with him! He seems wonderful!"
I nod and keep a grin on my face. I don't think I will be happy with him. Not truly. But hey, I can hope.
"Yeah! I can't wait to start my life with him!..." I say, my smile faltering just a little bit. But Martha doesn't seem to notice.

I talk with more and more friends, dance with them and with my new husband through the night. It's actually pretty fun, I can admit that I enjoyed myself a lot!
But when it gets late, I go back to my bedroom of course. I'm pretty tired by the end of the night and want to sleep, but Johns already sitting there on my bed.
"Oh, hello," I say to him, "Did you have a nice day?"
He pats the bed, gesturing for me to come and sit beside him. I do as I'm told.
"I did, it was wonderful." He says, he leans in to kiss me, and I just hold back a sigh and kiss him. I've already kissed him once today, isn't that enough?
He only pulls back once he needs to take a breath, then he kisses me again and puts his hand in my hair and pulls me a little closer. I don't think I like where this could lead.
I pull back after a minute and smile at him, "Well, I think we should get to sleep now." I go to stand up so I can go change, but he grabs my hand and with a smile, shakes his head.
"No, darling, stay with me for a little while longer," He says softly. Once again, he kisses me, wrapping his arms around my waist to pull me even closer to him. And then he starts to mess with the lace on the back of my dress, and I know exactly where this is going. I'm shocked, but I knew this would happen soon enough. I don't object, because I can't. Soon enough, my dress becomes loose and slips off of my shoulders.

Eventually, we fall asleep together.