The Hideout

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐍𝐄

BAILEY MILLERS P.O.V.

THE annoying, loud sound of my alarm clock through the once quiet room, I groan and toss over, slamming my hand down on the alarm clock successfully silencing it. I slowly peak my eyes open, wincing slightly as the bright morning light shone into them.

"Bailey, are you up?!" My mother yells from downstairs, knowing her she was probably stood at the bottom of the stairs with her arms crossed and a stern look on her face. I sigh and sit up, pushing my plain white comforter away from my body, "yeah, I'm up. I'll be down in a minute!" I yelled back and then slowly got out of my warm bed, much to my body's protest. I raise my arms in the air and stretch, smiling in satisfaction as my back pops.

"Come downstairs once you've finished getting ready. Remember to take your medication as well!" My mother yells again, causing me to roll my eyes. She's constantly reminding me to take my medication as if I'll forget to, which is highly unlikely since I've been taking them since I was ten, it's part of my life routine now.

I sigh and shake my head, heading towards the bathroom that was connected to my room.

Once in the bathroom I look towards the mirror, frowning at what I see. My hair is sticking up in every which direction, the eye bags under my eyes seemed to have darkened a lot more since yesterday. I sigh and open the cupboard that was securely stuck onto the wall, it was where I stored all the medication that I needed to have, I didn't want someone to use my bathroom and see all the medication bottles sprawled out near the sink, so I asked my father to install a cupboard that I could use.

Although I highly doubt someone would use my bathroom, seeing as I didn't have any friends, and my parents had their own bathroom so in reality, it was only me that used my bathroom. But it doesn't hurt to be prepared, maybe one day I'll make a friend or two, but I doubt that. I'm seventeen years old and I still hadn't managed to make friends.

My eyes scan the pill bottles until they stopped on the pill bottle that I was looking for, antidepressants.

No, I'm not depressed, I don't take them for depression. I take them because of my anxiety, the antidepressants help make me less anxious then I probably would be if I didn't take them.

Depression runs in my family, although it skipped my mother. So when I started showing signs of, what she thought was depression, at ten years of age she quickly took me to our local doctors and had me checked.

Luckily for her it turned out to not be depression but just a minor case of anxiety that the doctor claimed would go away as I grew up, he was wrong. Two months before my eleventh birthday my anxiety worsened, I was constantly on edge about everything, even if it was small.

I would constantly overthink peoples actions as well as my own, my mother tried to help me but just just made it worse. She tried helping me make friends but within a couple of days I wouldn't have that friend anymore.

It got so bad that my mother took me back to the doctors, they did more tests and it turns out that the anxiety was worse than they first thought. The doctor prescribed me with my first lot of antidepressants at ten and here I am, at seventeen, still taking them.

I grabbed the orange pill bottle, a frown playing at my lips. Truth was, I really did hate taking them.

Sometimes I wonder what it's like to be a normal teenager, making friends, having sleepovers, attending parties, going to the mall to hangout and shop at your typical shops. But a part of me didn't want to be like that, it didn't want to be a typical teenager.

I was normal in my own little way, I suppose.

Uncapping the bottle I tip three of the small pills that I have become used to seeing in my hand, three a day. The only thing that I really did despise was the awful feeling the pills left in my mouth and it also sucked that I had to eat breakfast with the taste still lingering in my mouth.

I sighed and grabbed the glass that was already filled with water, I always made sure that the glass was filled with water before going to bed, you could say that I was too lazy to do it in the morning, plus it was easier to have it already filled.

Placing the pills in my mouth I quickly drink the water, swallowing and washing the pills down. No matter how quickly I did it the taste was still there, making my face scrunch up in disgust.

Sighing, I place the now empty glass back down near the sink. I put the cap back onto the bottle of pills before placing them back into the cupboard, ready to be used for another day.

When I first started taking them I hated it. My ten year old self couldn't comprehend why she had to take the pills, she didn't understand. I used to think that I had some dangerous illness that could only be stopped by taking these pills, but as I grew up I came to realise that it wasn't some dangerous illness, it was just anxiety. I learnt to accept it as a part of me, it was something that made me the person who I am today.

Update? Yes!

I'm so excited to be finally showing this work to you, but I am also a little nervous. I've never wrote anything like this, so I sorry if the first chapter sucked and was slow or was boring.

What did you think?