Often [COMPLETED]

Dear Lukas...

It's kinda weird, knowing you'll be reading this and I won't get to see you react to it. But that's the point of this letter, huh? Because I won't.

I lost my legs in an incident when I was little. I'm lucky that they saved me, even if it would only last a few more years, I'm grateful for it. Otherwise, I wouldn't have met you.

When they called me back to the hospital I knew it was going to end soon. I had already planned for it. I was ready to die.

But after staying in that room with you, hanging out, talking. It felt good. It felt good to be alive. It felt good to be laughing, smiling with someone.

I had no intention of making any friends, especially since I get attached quite too easily. I couldn't fool myself, though. I felt as if we've been friends forever as I got to know you.

You never truly barged in either, you didn't judge me of my flaws, you didn't treat me differently because of my stumps-of course, you couldn't see, but that's beyond the point. I know you would've treated me the same even if you saw my condition. That's what I liked about you. You were so-what's the word? I can't think of just one right now.

You were a secluded, gloomy, pessimist when I first met you. Quiet too. Distant, in a way. It made me feel sad. It was like you had no hope. I tried to give you some, and I really think I did. You seemed happier. You cheered me up when I was feeling down. I'm glad for that at least.

It was only three days, but it felt like forever. I wish I could've stayed longer. Honestly, no joke.

Hey, don't be sad, I can already tell how you feel. This isn't a goodbye letter, even if it seems like one. This is a-hold on, let me find a new pen, th s one is dy n

Okay, new pen. What I was saying, this isn't goodbye, this is a reminder. I'm always going to be there. And whether you remember me or not, I just want to to say thanks. Thanks for being someone I needed.

Funny, right? You gave me hope, I gave you some of that too.

No tears, no regrets, just a memory. A thought. I hope this doesn't come as a burden. I'd really hate to burden you.

What was I to you? Not that I'd ever know.

I'm stalling. My hand is shaking. I'm scared, to be honest. Now that I know I have something to lose. But you're with me, so what's to be scared about?

The nurses are waiting for me to finish. So I guess this is it. I'll see you later Lukas.

- Jesse