12.

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Faith Elizabeth
Our evening of filming began in the bathroom. Shawn stood in front of the mirror and I leant against the doorway.
When instructed I walked through the door, fully aware of every light and camera focused on my face.
I walked slowly up to him before wrapping my arms around his torso and resting my face against his back.
We held that position for a good few seconds before Shawn turned and I kept my arms on his waist. We just spend a while looking into each other's eyes as the track played in the background on repeat. I was glad that there was no set blocking to it and it just felt more natural.
He cupped my face and his thumbs brushed against my cheeks. I closed my eyes briefly and in that brief moment I felt his lips come into contact with mine and I gripped onto his T-shirt.
"Cut. Good. Let's do that little sequence again" someone yelled as me and Shawn pulled part.

We did the same sequence over and over again and each time I felt the same butterflies and I felt the same adrenaline each time he brushed his thumbs against my face, and soon, I forgot about the cameras and I forgot about the lights and all the people watching. I really was falling all in him. But there was that ever present nagging voice in my head saying that I shouldn't get over my head about it. About him.

"Take five" Tom yelled and I let out a large breath.
"Do you want to go and get a drink?" Shawn asked and I nodded.
We walked down to his kitchen and I sat on one of his counter tops.
"How are you feeling?" I asked him and he nodded.
"Good. I think it's going really well" he smiled and I nodded. "Almost feels real"
"Yeah. Apart from the cameras, the lights, and all the people watching" I said with a giggle.
"What do you think about when we're filming?" He asked me and I shrugged. "Come on, I wanna know"
"I don't. I think about you" I said.
"Me?"
"Yeah I-"
"Guys were going to start again" we heard from up the stairs and I was glad I didn't have to explain.

Quickly we both went back upstairs and still the track was playing on repeat.
"I'm getting bored of hearing this song" Shawn said behind me.
"I love this song" I said.
"Right guys all I'm going to say is that you need to get from A to B" nameless director said pointing from the middle of the room and then pointing over to the bed. "It doesn't really matter how you get there just take your time and make it real. When you're ready"

We walked into the middle of the room and I suddenly felt awkward with him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled my waist towards him.
"What are you thinking about?" He asked me again. And my heart started to race.
"You" I breathed before crashing my lips onto his.

All I could think about in that moment was that I was an incredibly lucky seventeen year old girl to be able to have this opportunity. I knew I was young, and I was aware that some people were not going to appreciate that and may look down upon it.

He pulled away and brought his head down to whisper in my ear.
"Stop thinking" he said and I smiled.
He placed his forehead against mine and I fiddled with the bottom of his T-shirt.
He gave me a small nod and he helped me to slip the material over his head.
I ran my fingers over his torso and he smiled. I held onto his waist as he held mine under the shirt.
We walked backwards together and I couldn't help but let out a laugh as we both fell backwards, Shawn on top of my little frame.

We both laughed together for a moment before I think we both realised what we were doing. He turned his smiles into a kiss and I made note of the cameras moving around us.
I bent up my leg so my knee was level with his waist.
Slowly he ran his hand from my hip and down my leg and I had to put my lips together in a tight line to prevent myself from making a noise.
I ran my fingers through his hair as he ran his hand back up to my hip.

"And cut" nameless director yelled and Shawn quickly stood up. As in a bit too quickly. I almost felt embarrassed. I sat up and brought my knees up to my chest.
"I think we'll call it a wrap for tonight guys" Tom said and Shawn walked away from where I remained sat. "Great job" Tom said and he walked away as well.
I nodded to myself as the cameras and lights were packed away. I slid off the bed slowly and slid off Shawn's white shirt, laying it on the bed.
I walked back downstairs to where all my clothes were. I slid them back on and looked at myself in the mirror. Part of me couldn't believe what had happened. Part of me could only focus on how Shawn walked away without a word. Was it that bad for him?
I packed up all my things and walked out of his house without saying a word.

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