Art Book

Why

Sasha left earlier today. He thinks everyone's right about him. But they're not. Sasha.. was a good person. Despite everyone believing he wasn't. He's not once gotten angry at me. And I've never seen him angry at anyone else before either.

But here's the thing. For the first time in a long time.. I've felt my heart break for a friend. I cried. I cried.. and I cried.. and I can't stop crying. Because I know differently.

And I feel like I didn't do enough for him. Like this was entirely my fault. Whatever might have happened.. all this.. it's my doing.

I didn't give him enough support.

I wasn't there enough.

I never asked him how his day was going.

I never offered him a shoulder to lean on.

All I did was vote on some of his art. Not even all of it.

And I feel like shit for it. I feel.. so.. dragged down.. so.. Zombified. I can barely walk three feet without bawling my eyes out. I'm so sorry, Sasha.. I'm so.. so sorry I wasn't there.

I wish I would've known.. I wish I would've taken the effort to.. to make you happier. I'm such a shit friend.. and how can I even call you a friend?

I haven't done anything to deserve that title. My eyes burn.. I've got a headache.. I feel like crying again. But I'm so.. so tired.. tired of.. it all. Every single one of my friends have so many problems on their shoulders..

And I want to lighten the load. I want to hug you. To be your shoulder. To hold you and tell you it's going to be okay.

But I can't.

Please.. please.. if you're one of my friends.. tell me. Confide in me. I'm here for you, I.. just please. I don't want a repeat of today. I don't want to LOSE another one of you.. I'm so so sorry...