ONE DAY [ MATHEW BARZAL ]

- six hours -

I continued on to my parents house, each step taking a huge hit to my already broken heart. I didn't want to leave Mathew, I sure as hell don't want to get on that plane now after everything we have shared today. My thoughts kept going back to what if we met earlier, what if we were already in a relationship, what if I never applied to the Ruskin School of Art. But I always stop myself from going any further, my choices have led me here today and while it hurts to be leaving, who knows what the future may hold? Because I sure as hell did not imagine meeting Mathew today, yet here we are.

I turn into my street, a sadness washing over my features when I realise this is going to be the last time I walk down this street of a long, long time. Yet the pain I feel doesn't amount to how much it hurt walking away from Mathew.

Gosh, I can never seem to get him out of my thoughts no matter how hard I try he just wont leave them, and yet I don't want him to leave them. If he leaves my thoughts then I will wonder if he was real, if what we shared was real. But knowing now that he is, knowing the heartache that will follow when I leave will prove to me that he is real and that I may never share something like this with any male who enters my life like Mathew did.

I push the door to my parents home open to find the lights are off and the room is dark, I sigh before flicking them on and almost have a heart attack at what is before me.

"Surprise!" Everyone in the room yells when I turned the lights on. I jump, grasping at my heart as it sky rockets. I see my mother and father rush over to me; giant grins are placed on their lips as they stand before me.

"W-What is this?" I stutter trying to regain my composer. My eyes travel around the room to see if I can spot Mathew when I noticed Austin in the room, but he is no where and my heart deflates.

"It's a surprise going away party with everyone you are going to miss when you go." My mother tells wrapping an arm over my shoulder and brings me into it. I form a smile on lips, genuinely happy that some of my friends and family are here but the most important person out of them all is missing. Gosh, I wish Austin had have introduced Mathew and I sooner. He could be here right now, holding me in his arms and telling me how much he is going to miss me when I am away. I can't help but feel selfish as I think about that, Mathew has only known me for eight hours and I want us to be in a relationship when I am about to leave for a good few months, years maybe.

"Oh that's awesome." I reply with a smile, my eyes moving around the room to see everyone who came. It brings a sadness to me, my heart aching as I know these are my friends and it will be a long time before I see them again. But I am about to embark on a journey that will bring me new people in my life, a new life that sounds exciting as I think on it. I am going to do what I love, I am going to get a degree in something that I want my future to be about, yet somewhere in me tells me that Mathew will be my future too.

"Come on, let's get this party started." My father calls out and the crowd cheers. Soon music is being played and I am being brought to every single person in the room, a smile prominent on my lips as I speak to them and thank them for coming.

After a few minutes of greeting everyone and thanking them for coming, I hunt out Austin in the crowd of people. He spots me coming towards him, gesturing for me to hurry up. When I stop in front of him, he hands me bottle of beer.

"Where is Mathew? I thought you two were going to spend the day together." Austin says as we move to a quieter area in the party. An involuntary smile forms on my lips at the mention of Mathew, it catches Austin's attention which puts a knowing smile on his lips.