⚬ chapter thirty-eight

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I throw on my black sherpa jacket as I observe myself in the mirror

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I throw on my black sherpa jacket as I observe myself in the mirror. My high waisted black jeans makes my long legs look endless and my red long sleeve crop t-shirt brings out the pink hues of my blush. Not that I have anyone to impress at the party, but I like dressing up for myself and in all honesty, it's a little daunting being Greyson's girlfriend.

Dating the hottest guy in school, I feel like I need to make sure I show everyone I'm at the same standard which is sometimes exhausting. But, sometimes it's worth it to put up with shit like that when it means being happy and god, am I happy.

"Hey hottie," Ronnie says as she walks back into our room, the sound of the heels of her booties clicking against the floor. "You ready to go?"

"Yes ma'am," I say before sending an air kiss her way. "You're looking extra dolled up," I observe as I notice her black leather pants and sheer silver shirt that has a bit of sparkle on it on top of her black bralette. I notice her blush a little, making me remember exactly why she's dressed up like this. "You're talking to Lucas, tonight! How could I forget?"

"I was hoping you would," She says, scuffing the bottom of her shoe on the floor out of nervousness as we lock the door behind us and walk towards the stairwell. "It's no big deal, Jo."

"False," I say with a smile. "If anything, it's the biggest deal. Badass Ron has a soft side, that's news."

"I do not," She mutters shoving me and almost causing me to lose my balance on the stairs. "And anyway, we're leaving for break in a few days so it's not like anything is going to happen now. If ever."

I stop at the bottom of the stairwell with my arms crossed. "Excuse me? What happened to Veronica fucking Dale? You know, the badass bitch who knows her self worth?" I ask, clearly annoyed at how much she's putting herself down. It's so foreign for me to see because she's usually so confident in herself.

"Okay, you're right. I'm just really nervous, Jo. I really like him," She explains. "It's never been like this before. It's a lot easier not to catch feelings for guys."

"Oh, trust me, I know, but you can't control your feelings so you just gotta hang on for the ride," I say, wrapping an arm around her as the cold breeze hits our face. "God, who have I become?"

She shudders. "Who have I become?"

"So what's your plan of action?" I ask as I pull out a cigarette, lighting it as I place it in my mouth. She shrugs her shoulders with no verbal response. "I take that to mean you're just going to go up and talk to him and see what happens? Well, I'd be more on board with that if you weren't all nervous nelly right now."

She watches the smoke I breathe out before responding. "I haven't totally lost my sense of self," She says, shoving me a little with a laugh. "Besides, he rejects like ten girls a week so if it fails, I'm just another number."

This time I shove her. "You won't be another number."

"How's the boyfriend?" Ronnie asks with a smile as I take another drag my cigarette, feeling the smoke flow into my lungs. For some reason, smoking lately hasn't been as satisfying as it used to be, but I can't figure out why.

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