Tanith

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The wind spun through the streets of London town, tousling Tanith's hair from where she sat on the top of the Tower Bridge. She allowed the blonde tendrils of hair to whip around her face as she stared out at the lights of the city reflected in the Thames. She exhaled slowly. At least London hadn't changed in the two years she'd been gone.

She'd left the Sanctuary the day after she'd been given the all-clear from the Medical Wing --which hadn't taken too long due to the fact that the Black Cleaver's cuts had only been shallow ones and healed quickly. Only the cut on her arm, which had been slightly deeper, had left a (barely) noticeable scar. Ordinarily, Tanith would have asked Kenspeckle Grouse for some of his no-scarring balm having seen it work wonders for Valkyrie in the past but she'd been shocked to have been informed that Kenspeckle had died two years ago; killed by a Remnant. She'd missed so much in the time she'd been possessed and so many of the people she knew were dead. Even Ghastly.

Ghastly is dead.

Tanith felt herself choke on her grief, but she'd promised herself she wouldn't cry anymore, her eyes were tight and sandpaper-dry with shed tears anyway and hardly in a condition to sob. She'd played and re-played the last time they'd spoken. They'd never get to have that dinner he'd talked about. Tanith imagined Ghastly knowing that she was taken over and continueing with life as normal, as it chipped away at him. Had he loved her? Maybe. Had she loved Ghastly? She wasn't sure. She suspected that the answer lay closer to the negative. This, of course, only made Tanith feel worse.

Uncrossing her legs, Tanith took her sword from its scabbard and stared mournfully at the glittering blade. She didn't want to think about the battle and she defintely didn't want to give herself a headache, but the smirking, sun-glassed face of Billy-Ray Sanguine appeared in her mind's eye. They'd been engaged. Tanith understood that she hadn't been herself. Tanith understood that her Remnant-self hadn't had feelings or a conscience. She knew Sanguine was a psychopath; he killed people and enjoyed it. Tanith knew all that and yet she wondered. Had some part of her been attracted to Billy-Ray Sanguine? Otherwise, why would her Remnant-self have been his fiancee? And when she killed, didn't some small part of her enjoy it, too? Didn't everyone have some dark part of them that didn't hate killing or violence?

At this point, things had gotten too philosophical and she'd quickly shut off those thoughts.

But still, Sanguine had fought for her, fought to defend her. Again, Tanith saw Billy-Ray battling the Black Cleaver with the God-Killer Dagger, erupting from the walls in the corridor in his haste to slash at the enemy, because in the end Billy-Ray had fought on their side. She saw the Dagger go skidding across the floor, saw Sanguine leap through the Black Cleaver's torso, leaving ruined armour and flesh in his wake, and Sanguine grinned, cocky with every right to be --he would have killed any living creature with that move. Unfortunately, the Black Cleaver had died a long while ago.

Tanith watched, in her mind, as the Cleaver's scythe spun out across Billy-Ray's throat before she could have even shouted a warning, and Sanguine faltered, frowning, as a bloody line appeared at the cut. Desperately, his hands struggled to close the wound as his life gushed out of him in crimson rivers, staining the floor, soaking his clothes red. And then, Tanith saw him die. In her mind, she clung onto this image of Billy-Ray Sanguine and she ran to him, slipping in his blood, and she threw herself down to his side and screamed,

"WHY?" She asked him. Sanguine's bleeding body didn't answer. "Why?" She asked again.Why did she care so much? Why did she feel as though a fragment of herself had died with him? Why could she not let go of these memories? Why had he layed down his life for her?

A sudden image came to her of Sanguine sitting opposite her, smiling wryly as he said "Love makes fools of us all." and Tanith knew that this had happened, this was a miniscule shard of a memory ripped from her. And suddenly, for the thousandth time she'd run through her memories and opinion of Billy-Ray Sanguine, it made sense. Everything clicked together: Billy-Ray looking at her hesitantly when she'd woken from the Remnant, his shy movements around her, him helping her escape; how he'd argued to stay with Tanith instead of going with Valkyrie and the way he'd died trying to protect her fom the Black Cleaver, to stop it from getting to her. Tanith's eyes grew wide, pin-pricking at the backs. In the end Billy-Ray Sanguine had been a good guy.

And he had loved her.

Had she loved him? She didn't know and she didn't want to know. Tanith felt a sudden longing to see Valkyrie and reached for her phone, only to remember that Valkyrie had left. She'd left Ireland a week after the battle at Roarhaven and a week of much-needed family time. She hadn't told anyone where she was going, not even Skulduggery. Just packed up, said her quick goodbyes and apologies as if she could barely stand to be present anymore, taken her car and gone who knew where. Although, Tanith suspected she'd left the country. Valkyrie needed some time alone, Tanith got that. But right now, she needed a friend, selfish as that was.

Tanith sighed sadly.

So much had changed.

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