Unnameable

Four. Can you want something too much?

Forest

I try to concentrate. French... Je suis, tu es, il es... or is it il est? I want to ask, but she doesn't stop. She keeps on talking. I can't listen. I can hear her, but I can't listen. Not to her. I listen to the birds singing outside. 

Focus. 

I have to focus. I stare. I can see the words on the blackboard, but I can't read. Not those words. I can read the words in the clouds. They remind me of when we went stargazing at night, but all we could see were clouds and a slight shimmer of the moon shining through... The moon doesn't shine. It's just an illusion. It reminds me of us. An illusion. 

We were just an illusion. We wanted it, but it wasn't true. I wanted it. I don't know if you did. I don't think you did. I don't think you wanted it. Especially not like I did. I really wanted it. Maybe a little too much. Can you want something too much? 

I remember that unicorn toy in the store when I was 8. Did I want it? Yes. Did I want it too much? I don't know. I don't think so. I got over it. I don't want it anymore. Is that how you decide if you want something too much? Whether you get over it or not? Because if that's the case, I don't know if I'll ever get over you. I won't. Everyone says I will, but I don't believe them. I still want you. 

I guess I want you too much.