My Life is Not a Manga, or maybe...

Harem Scarem: 034

I had a problem, and it wasn't that I was needing to dodge Debbie the glasses girl at least once a day in increasingly bizarre situations. That was more amusing than anything, really. Sure, I was late to a few more classes than just pre-calc, but I figured the fact a potential new harem member was being thrown at me so insistently meant that things were working out in my favor for once.

No, my problem was of course my upcoming Halloween date with Paula. Though I tried multiple times to pin her down on what exactly she had planned on Saturday, the only info I extracted was that she expected me in costume, would pick me up at 3pm, and that we would be attending a Halloween party of some sort.

I'm fairly certain the only reason she didn't tell me more was because she liked watching me squirm.

In any case, the costume wasn't too difficult. I dug out the pirate getup I'd worn a few years ago, which aside from the pants still fit pretty well. It wasn't exactly a fancy costume—mostly just an eyepatch, a hat that vaguely resembled a tricorn if you squinted, and an off-white shirt with ruffles. I added a dark pair of pants and figured that was good enough. If Paula wanted to win at a Halloween fashion show, she should have given me significantly more warning.

What stumped me was that I'd never attended a high school party before—much less one presumably hosted by seniors—and had no idea what to expect. Not only that, but a Halloween party simply wasn't something I'd ever come across in a manga. Heck, Halloween getting a mention at all was pretty rare, since it was more of a Western holiday and hadn't really been coopted by the Japanese the way holidays like Christmas and Valentine's Day had. Perhaps this was related to what Mom had told me about the manga getting more realistic the further I stretched the genre; I'd subverted the last few manga situations, so now I was stuck dealing with something a little further from the manga baseline. Impossible to tell for sure, I suppose, but I hadn't realized how much I'd been relying on knowing what sorts of things I could expect thanks to my generalized manga knowledge. I had certain preconceptions about high school parties from various American movies, but was doubtful they had any bearing on my situation. Or reality in general.

Ugh, it was like I was right back to the summer when I had no idea what to expect. I was half tempted to just call up Paula and cancel the whole thing, but I wasn't confident I would be able to successfully dodge a manga coincidence with Debbie forever. I was reasonably certain Paula wasn't interested in getting closer to me romantically, at least, though that begged the question of what she was doing in the harem in the first place. If she hadn't basically promised to talk to me if I agreed to this scheme of hers, I'd have had no compunction refusing outright. Especially because I was beginning to wonder if alienating Paula would actually do that much damage to my social life, given that she was two grades my senior and despite appearances did not appear to be particularly interested in socializing with kids her own age. Perhaps a thought to keep in mind if this whole situation went south...

In any case, I suffered through the rest of the week dreading the coming of the weekend. Which ended up rolling around anyway, as time is wont to do. Stupid time.

# # #

A little before 3pm on Saturday I was loitering in the kitchen, half-heartedly snapping the elastic strand on my plastic eyepatch back and forth between my hands. The darn thing was even more uncomfortable than I remembered it being, and I was debating just conveniently forgetting it at home. Before I had a chance to make up my mind, however, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it," I called, and went to meet my fate.

It was indeed Paula, but if I hadn't been expecting her, I might not have recognized her. She was wearing an ornate, old-style dress made out of what looked like embossed velvet in such a deep shade of red it was almost black. Her white shirt or blouse or whatever it was featured bountiful lacey ruffles, but pulled taught about her chest. She still looked well-endowed, but the cut of the dress or the ruffles or something made her chest seem much more normally sized. Aside from her face, she had almost no skin showing at all. The dress was high-necked, long-sleeved, and fell right to the tops of her feet. She wasn't wearing gloves, but the lace spilling out at her wrists came all the way to the back of her hands.