If I didn't live the way I do I would be happy. The simple answer is that its impossible. Happiness in my world doesn't exist. So I should stop, just give up. I am worth nothing. Of all the people in the world I don't deserve to live. Someone else would be so much happier to be here, so why me? Why do I have to live? I wont ever know until maybe when I am dead. I first cut myself due to a silly thing that made every other problem I have bubble up and over. I felt like I will never equate to anything. I felt like I would never succeed. And sadly every time I look into the mirror I still feel that way. Sometimes I want to scream I am not okay and just tell someone I am suffering but that takes way to much courage something I don't have. People questioned why I had so many scratches on my arm and I told them It was a cat, I am sorry I lied, I am sorry that I am not okay. You have no idea how much I wanted to tell you the truth. I thank you for caring about be so much. I truly am surrounded by people who love me. I am thankful for that. It's now a few days before Thanksgiving 11/22/18 and as you already know I am thankful for a lot of things. Whoever may read this thank you for noticing me. I'm surrounded by happiness but I don't know why I am always upset. School is extremely stressful and I wish it would just stop. I wish a lot of things but mainly for my possible anxiety and depression to go away. It's now 11/24/18. A lot of things drive me to my insanity, I get overwhelmed very easily, noises drive me insane I just want it to be silent. I want and dream about a lot of things. I get obsessed with situations and replay them 100 times over and over in my head. I just wanna be calm and not be obsessed. I just wish I was no one at times so I didn't have to deal with people. I wish I knew my fate because I am sick of surprises. I wish I didn't care as much as I do it's embarrassing how much I do. I wish I didn't care what people thing about me. I wish I didn't have emotions. I wish I knew how to express my feelings and ask for help. I wish I was dead.
DU LIEST GERADE
Diary of a Depressed 15 year old
SachbücherHello, my name is Emma and this is basically all of my entries Into my journal over the past 3 years. Im hoping this will be a way to relieve all of my thoughts. Along with helping others letting them know their not alone. Everything that is written...
