Just A Handful O' Splatoon Skits

Goggles Finally Snaps

So this is my take on X-Blood vs. Team Blue battle (which at the moment hasn't happened yet).

Btw, Glasses got better from his bee incident, so he's back on the team.

Enjoy~!

~~~~~

"Inkcredible! Vintage has Goggles pinned to the ground! What will Goggles do!?" Marina exclaimed through the speakers. "So? How does it feel to taste defeat?" Vintage asked coldly, looming over Goggles who was lying seemingly exhausted in the X-Blood's enemy ink that covered nearly the entire stage. Vintage placed his foot on Goggles' chest, firmly crushing the blue Inkling's lungs and heart. "You may have defeated the S4, and even the Square King Cup champions, Team Emperor, but you'll never and I mean never be able to defeat my team, the X-Blood!" Vintage exclaimed, shoving his foot into Goggles' chest every time he emphasized a word. "It's been lovely seeing your crushing loss, so I'm going to end your misery now. And don't even bother trying to re-ink the place! It'll merely be a waste of effort. Not that your efforts even mattered anyway," Vintage said in a pitched tone.

He readied his Ballpoint Splatling and pointed it at Goggles' head. "So, do you have any last words before I splat you?" Vintage interrogated. Silence was present, and just when Vintage was about to make a taunting statement again, Goggles started to chuckle. "Eh?" Vintage sounded. "Huh? What's happenin' down there? Let's get a closer look at what they're saying! Yo, cameraman! Zoom in on that!" Pearl commanded. The jellyfish complied and zoomed in on the pair, making sure they're capturing every moment live. "You know... you're probably the worst opponent I've fought against, Vintage," Goggles began. "Excuse me?" Vintage questioned. "I've battled against people like you. A good many of my most memorable opponents had your kind of attitude. Yet, every time it's always the same. Despite defeating a dozen powerful enemies, people still think they can defeat us easily. You, by far, have been an overinflated example of that. Is it because we're quote-unquote "idiots?" Is it because we're C-rank? Well..." Goggles trailed off, clutching at Vintage's Ballpoint Splatling, ripping it out of his hands and throwing it across the map; all while laying down and with a foot pressing down on his chest. "Wh-What in the--!?" Vintage cried, clearly flustered. "W... Wow! Goggles threw Vintage's Splatling away just like that!" Marina exclaimed. "Maybe it's 'cause nobody bothered to register the fact that a bunch of kids defeated some kings!" Goggles yelled with a maniacal smile plastered onto his face, grabbing Vintage by the ankle and hurling him into a nearby wall. "WOAH! Goggles just... lobbed Vintage into a wall!" Pearl shouted. Goggles got up and cracked his neck, smiling "happily."

"All this time, I've been keeping my cool. I've kept the anger from coming loose, always acting shamelessly positive and just trying to have fun, not letting the arrogance get to me. But as anyone knows, no matter how long you keep up the facade, you're eventually going to SNAP, no matter how patient you are," Goggles piped in a cheerful tone, twitching on the "snap." Where... where did this menacing aura come from!? But he's smiling? Why am I shaking? Is this... fear? Vintage thought, staggering to his feet as he tried to recover from the throw. "I really don't want to do this... but I feel like I'm going to go insane if I don't," Goggles growled, rushing at Vintage. He grabbed him by the head and smashed him into the wall several times until ink started coming out of his head. He then started spinning him 'round and around until finally releasing him face-first into the ground. Goggles then crouched down and grabbed the back of Vintage's head again, bringing Vintage's ear near his mouth. "Here a piece of advice for ya: never underestimate your opponent. Whether they're S+rank or C-rank, it doesn't matter. You may or may not be surprised at what they can do. Another piece of advice for ya: don't focus so much on winning and bringing other people down! It's a good ambition to be the best, but you gotta stay humble and not let it go to your head. Now, that's easier said than done, but it's worth a try, you know? Just have fun. It's simpler than it looks," Goggles whispered. He let go, lifting his foot and violently stomping on Vintage's head to finish him off as Vintage exploded into pale blue ink, his squid-angel flying away. "V-V-V-Vintage h-has b-b-been... s-splatted," Marina stammered. The rest of the X-Blood, Team Blue, and the stadium were in shock. "H-He... he managed to splat him with his bare hands..." Rider stated, dumbfounded. "Is this even the same Goggles!?" Gloves exclaimed. "Goggles..." Glasses murmured. "What happened to you?"

"Aha... ahaha..." Goggles huffed heavily. "Phew... really needed to get that out of my system!" he laughed, wiping his forehead. "One-- one minute left! Will Team Blue be able to re-ink the stage in time?" Pearl announced, her voice a little shaky. Ah, right! I need to focus on the Turf War! Goggles remembered. He then quickly snatched his Splattershot, and started inking the floor like nothing happened. He managed to find his teammates again and encouraged them to start inking more turf. "Come on guys! Let's ink it back up!" he cheered. Glasses, Headphones, and Bobble Hat didn't respond. "Huh? What wrong, guys? Everything okay?" Goggles asked with seemingly genuine concern. "AH! E-E-Everything's fine! We'll start inking right away!" Headphones blurted in reply, shooting her charger over the X-Blood's ink. "Y-Yes! Let's do that!" Glasses chimed in, frantically lashing at the floor with his Inkbrush.

Bobble didn't say anything and threw ink everywhere with her Slosher, covering as much turf as she could. It was subtle but: you could see her smile falter and twitch as it struggled to remain it's hold on her face. "Ah...! Team Blue is painting at inkcredible speed!" Marina exclaimed. "Jeez... who knew Goggles had that in him?" Aloha commented. "It is indeed a shock to see him act that way. Usually he's upbeat and positive, with the occasional unthinkable act of nudity and-or ridiculousness," Army stated in turn, his eyes closed and his finger on his chin. "It reeeaaaaally makes you thiiiiink..." Mask said. "What other demooooons are hiding in that iiidioootic squuiiiiid??" he finished.

Vintage had respawned back at the base, where his teammates fled to him in worry. "Vintage! Are you okay? That was scary!" Red Sole exclaimed, clutching her Bloblobber tightly. "Tch... it looks like they're stronger than we thought! Way stronger. There isn't much time left and they're covering up a majority of our ink! But it's fine, we can still win this!" Double Egg reassured. Vintage then suddenly collapsed to his knees. "Vintage!" Omega cried. "No... we can't win... it's too late... they-- no he-- is just gonna destroy us again," Vintage muttered, supporting himself on the ground with his arms. He punched the spawn point he was kneeling on in frustration. "Damn it!" he yelled. "Woah, slow down there Vintage I know you're upset--" Double Egg began. "30 seconds left on the clock! Will the idi-- I MEAN the Blue Team paint enough turf on time?" Pearl questioned. "Whatever! I'm gonna claim victory no matter what the circumstances are!" Red Sole declared, rushing forward with her Bloblobber, throwing bubbles and claiming turf. "Not so fast!" Headphones called out, rounding a corner and splatting Red Sole with her Charger. "Ah!" Red Sole cried, returning back to her spawn point.

"Eh?! They're here already??!" Double Egg exclaimed. "Wow!! Team Blue has managed to cover roughly half the stage! How is that even possible!?" Marina announced. "Grh... I'll handle this," Omega assured, readying her Nautilus Splatling. She pulled the trigger, firing off a continuous bombardment of ink bullets. "Woah!" Headphones cried as she narrowly dodged the flying blobs of ink. Bobble then came in and splatted Omega with a Burst Bomb. "Thanks, Bobble!" Headphones called. Bobble gave a simple thumbs up and continued covering more turf. "I don't think so!" Double Egg declared, firing his Tetra Dualies at the two best girls. "Neither do I!" acclaimed Glasses, taking a swing at Double Egg. "Too slow!" Double Egg taunted, dodging the attack. "Huh!?" Glasses exclaimed. "I got it!" cried Goggles. "Special Weapon: Inkzooka!" he announced. He fired the weapon, splatting Double Egg.

"Five seconds left! 5... 4... 3... 2... 1! Game! Stoop playing~!" Pearl and Marina chanted at the same time. "It's hard to immediately tell who won! It seems that it'll be similar to Team Blue's battle against Team Emperor!" Marina aforementioned. "We'll just have to find out don't we? Let's hear the results, Judd and Lil' Judd!" Pearl commanded. The two cats danced around; a little longer than usual for added tension; and... "Team Blue wins! From exactly 51% to 49%!" Pearl and Marina announced. "Yay! We won, we won!" Goggles cheered, pulling Glasses' pants down. He obviously got hit and recieved a good scolding from his teammate for that action. However, the heavy tension from Goggles' violent scene with Vintage earlier finally began to set in, causing an awkward atmosphere for Team Blue's acquaintances, friends and rivals.