Indifference or Disinterest

Chapter VI

Ryan was trying very hard to suppress the unwarranted giggles that were trying to force their way up his throat. He didn't feel drunk, at least not in the way that he'd expected he would. He had finished one mug of coke and whiskey that, admittedly, had been stronger than he would have preferred, but Jon had mixed the first round of drinks before the other three had learned their lesson. The plan had been for Spencer to mix them, making Jon's stronger than theirs to make their goal easier, but Jon had insisted. Cut to Ryan standing up to change the music that was playing and finding the room a little spinny. He braced himself on his desk and allowed the feeling to pass. 

He didn't feel too strange, apart from the lightheadedness while standing, and the fact that his thoughts seemed to be a little louder. They were harder to ignore. While sober, he might have had the fleeting thought that Brendon's lips looked soft, and then he would push it away and think about something else. While tipsy, it seemed that singular thought took over, and it was all he could think about. His mind had one track, and the only destination that track lead to was how badly he wanted to kiss Brendon. 

He made it to the speaker, skipping the catchy yet annoying song from their youth that had come up on Jon's playlist. The next song was much better, and Ryan settled back into his spot on the carpet, maybe allowing his knee to touch Brendon's just the slightest bit. They had all thrown their cards in the middle of their circle, seemingly over the game of poker that Jon had been winning.

"Okay, we're playing truth or dare." Spencer announced smugly. That had not been a part of the plan, and Ryan inhaled some of the drink he'd been sipping and started coughing violently. His throat burned and his eyes watered as he tried to get the liquid out of his lungs. "Easy there, buddy." Spencer thumped him on the back in a way he thought was helpful. He glared silently at Spencer before glancing around to check the reactions of the others. Jon seemed more than willing to play. Brendon was less keen but shrugged in acceptance. 

"I'll start." Jon said before anyone could beat him to it. "Spencer, truth or dare?"

"Truth." 

Jon seemed a little disappointed for a split second before he smiled once more. "How old were you when you lost your virginity?" 

Spencer didn't hesitate. "Seventeen." Jon looked like he wanted more information, but didn't press it. "Ryan, truth or dare?" Spencer asked.

"Oh my god, we're seriously doing this?" No one responded, and he sighed heavily. "Truth, I guess."

Spencer pretended to think about what he wanted to ask, although it was too overacted to seem genuine. Ryan was reminded of Spencer's Never Have I Ever claim, and was suddenly even more nervous. "Do you currently have a crush on anyone?" Spencer tilted his head and batted his eyelashes innocently. Ryan flushed deeply, feeling all the heat rush to his face as he decidedly avoided looking at anyone other than his roommate. Ryan apparently didn't answer quickly enough for his liking, and he prompted Ryan again. "Welllllll?" He singsonged. 

"I don't know if crush is the right word." Ryan said hesitantly. 

"Well, let's see," Jon chimed in, "Do you think about him when he's not around? Do you fantasize about kissing him? Do you wake up from dreams about him with a boner?" 

Ryan squinted at Jon and took a large gulp of his drink, making a face at the bad taste the whiskey had. 

"Yep." Jon nodded sagely. "Our boy's got a crush." Spencer hid a giggle behind his hand. A giggle. That made everyone other than Ryan laugh. "Who is it?"

Ryan scoffed. As if he was going to answer a second question. "Brendon?" He asked before realizing that sounded like he was answering the question after all. "Truth or dare?" He quickly added, noting the slight raise to Brendon's eyebrows.