The 10% (coming soon)

The It Girl

~Loki~

I read somewhere that 10% of any population is cruel, 10% is merciful, and the remaining 80% can be swayed either way.

Ever since then, I've been debating where I stood. Would I be part of one of the ten percents? If so, which one? Or, am I just another one in the crowd; not special at all, just taking what's put in front of me and responding how society expects me to respond? The part that scared me the most wasn't the fact that some people are cruel down to the bone, but the fact that we don't know who those people are. That person could be a classmate, a friend, a relative and you may never know. But even then, what defines an evil person? Their actions? Their lack of remorse? Or even their lack of action?

Well, by the end of this year, I'd get all of the answers to my questions.

My name's Loki Allen and I'm just an ordinary 17-year-old girl, trying to make it through Senior year. I'm white, I'm straight, I'm 5'6", I have platinum blond hair, ice blue eyes, I'm the cheer team captain, I have good friends, a loving boyfriend, loving parents, a slim body, good grades, good manners, healthy thoughts, and way too innocent for this world; just how society wants me to be. Oh, and I have a unique name, which is just so quirky, am I right?

Or at least I was.

Many would say that I was perfect, and many would agree, but the truth is that nearly everything I just listed, was a complete lie. I may have looked perfect on the outside, but trust me, I was far from it. Everyone was jealous of how "good" I had it, when in reality, I had a cheating boyfriend, nonexistent parents, horrible mental health, and the straightest thing about me is my hair; hell even my hair is fake. I've been dying it platinum since middle school.

Here are the few things that were actually true on that list:

1. Good friends, who are Bella, Audrey, and Maddison.

2. A slim body that honestly wasn't worth the damage it took to get it

3. Good grades, because I can't get into a good college without them

4. Good manners, because God forbid people to find out how "imperfect" I am.

Millions of girls around the world are trying their best to live up to society's expectations, but the truth is, that it's an impossible feat. One reason why is that its expectations are always changing. Only a few decades ago the societal expectations for a woman were to be a good wife, remain innocent, and be able to bear children. Now women are supposed to be skinny, but curvy at the same time; be smart and independent, but also submissive; Be successful, but not more successful than a man; Be beautiful, but don't worry too much about appearances; You can be sad every once in a while, but don't have any actual baggage or problems; look well dressed and presentable, but don't take too long getting ready; Be sexy, but not slutty; be a virgin, but still have experience in bed.

Just to name a few.

And of course, society's expectations vastly change depending on where you live. Something that is praised in one country may be a disgrace in another. And I'm not saying that only girls have impossible expectations; guys have some pretty insane ones too. And with social media being introduced into the equation has only made things worse, but that will be covered later.

A momentary feeling of dread filled me as I approached the high school I had been attending for the past 3 years. Shoulders high, head up, smile on. Let's go. I thought while I entered the front door.

Why was I doing this when I just ripped on society's expectations, you may ask. Well, it's different when you're already seen as perfect by everyone. No one actually expects every girl to be able to live up to the expectations, and they don't care all too much if girls don't try that hard. But when people already see you as perfect, you have to keep up your standard or else you'll be mocked, judged, avoided, the whole works. But you also need to know when to end the whole charade, or else it'll blow up in your face. My plan was to go to a college far away, where no one knows me, and start new.