↬ my moon ↫ WOOCHAN

╰☆☆ Oᖴ ᔕEᑕᖇETᔕ ᗩᑎᗪ ᒪIEᔕ ☆☆╮

they knew and they'd never forgive him
in that moment that's all he could think
they knew, they knew, they knew

*☆*――*☆*――*☆*――*☆*――*☆*――*☆*――*☆*――*☆*

"you saw, didn't you?" his voice was resigned and calm. his friends had backed off and given him room.

he had grabbed the sleeves of his jumper impulsively, and this had not gone unnoticed by woojin or jisung.

perhaps jisung was the most protective of him, he thought as he watched jisung eye twitch at his nervous habit.

he had never thought of that before.

protective.

of him.

that had only happened once.

his mum had always been protective, some would even say overprotective.

many believed that the shelter she attempted to keep over chan was only going to affect him negatively, that it was going to leave him innocent to the hardships of others and therefore ungrateful and spoilt.

"it's fine!" he says. he didn't want to seem thankless for the love that he had once received from them, or the worry, but he simply couldn't let them worry.

they were his stars, and stars were meant to dim their light for no one.

chan sighed and shook his head.

"really! i'm a lot better and haven't done anything like that in months." his laugh sounded carefree and humorous to the untrained ear, but woojin had fantasised about his laugh to notice how it didn't have the same chime to it.

chan noticed the way woojin looked to jisung for conformation and gritted his teeth.

being able to pull off his lie depended on how far up his arm jisung had seen.

it depended on how bad he'd fucked up.

he held his breath as jisung let his out.

"chan hyung..." he started. more air evacuated his mouth as tears threatened to flood his face.

"why would you lie to us?" he asked, eyes red with the pain of keeping the salt droplets contained.

"he's lying?" jeongin asked, face pale.

"let him try to tell us the truth at least." seungmin attempted to find a truce between the anguish of his friends.

this was ripping their family apart.

"chan hyung. it's now or never. please tell us what is really going on." seungmin reached his hand out to leave a loving touch on chan's arm, but seemed to think better of it and let his arm dangle lamely at his side.

chan looked up.

seungmin didn't even want to touch him.

that's how pathetic he was.

chan lifted his head weakly to study the faces of the people surrounding him.