The Void of a Future King (mxm)

17. Not Good Enough

"Remiul will love this, Oliver!"I exclaimed, looking at the watch in my hands.

The band is an elegant navy blue made of a thick leather. There was a crisp silver lining around the glass. Instead of the regular numbers, it was Roman numerals with small diamonds on it.

I figured that Rem deserved a little gift. He's been going through a lot and it's taken a toll on him, even if he doesn't realize it. My mother-instincts have been detecting stress and confusion. I have no idea where the confusion came from but it doesn't matter. If he needed me, he'd tell me.

The whole ordeal with him and Prince Samuel was just excruciating. He looked so embarrassed by the- dare I say- art. On top of being embarrassed he also had to figure out a solution, which stressed him out. I don't even think it had been completely about becoming king. Perhaps he cares more what people think of him.

"Go take it to him, honey."Oliver told me.

"You're the one who picked it out. We should go together."I said, but he shook his head.

"You go. He needs motherly love right now." He was right; are our needs the love that I can give him now more than ever.

I gave him a quick kiss before I went to look for our son. I started at his room but when he wasn't there, not in any of the rooms upstairs. So I went downstairs. I didn't see him there either so I decided to look in the pool before I went outside.

The closer I got the more I began to hear laughter and his voice. I pressed my ear against the door and couldn't hear them anymore. I pushed the door open, slow and gentle so I could surprise them.

The door was only a crack opened when I saw something I wish I hadn't.

Prince Samuel was holding Remiul's face in his hands as they kissed.

I dropped the box that I was holding. For a second I was worried they would hear but the thick mat on the floor suppressed any noise. Quickly, I closed the door just as gently as I opened it and picked the box back up.

I stayed frozen in place for a second. My mind was unable to comprehend what I saw.

I had no clue he was gay. All his life I always imagined him marrying a beautiful girl, like Arabella. His father and I re-enforced it in his brain, almost. We would always talk about him finding the perfect princess to rule the kingdom with. Never had the thought of him wanting a man to rule the kingdom with crossed my mind.

I should've known, right? I am his mother. I should've sensed it. I should've noticed when he never had hook ups with anyone and his only girlfriend was Arabella. It was too good to be true. She was the perfect girl, in theory, for him so of course he'd pick her. I should've known he was never in love with her. That he only married her because it was the strategic thing to do.

I should've known that he like Prince Samuel. Rem has been giving him more attention than he'd been giving Arabella ever since he's been staying here. I just excused it by thinking that it was because he got kicked out of his own home and was sad. It was partly due to that but only because he likes him. Wow.

The worst part of it all was the fact that the love they had for each other was so apparent. The split second that I saw them kiss, I saw the sweet passion they had for each other. It made me realize that it was always there, but I never noticed it.

Like how Remiul would look at Prince Samuel and have a conversation without talking. Or the way Prince Samuel looked at Remiul, like he was the most fascinating thing in the world. Remiul has the same look except for the way his eyes softened, like Prince Samuel was the most precious thing to him. But in both there eyes I could see that they didn't want to admit it.