From classical to rap

The show

The show creates a brand new form of nervousness in me and it was nothing like an playing in the orchestra. I was wearing a pair of black shorts and a tank top with the sides cut out and an luminous sports bra underneath. My ass length hair was in two space buns.
The show itself went smoothly, everyone seemed ok with me and I think the fans enjoyed it.
As per usual after the show comes an after party and I was a bit sceptical at first but went along anyway, what really tipped the scales is when Rook brushed his hand against the small of my back and whispered softly that everything would be okay and he would stay by my side all night so I wasn't lonely. The small gesture made my heart melt inside my chest.

The club itself was hot and steamy and just breathing in here was a chore and after 20 minutes of being there I felt like I couldn't breathe anymore and the walls were closing in and it may seem silly but I could feel a panic attack coming on from the tightness in my chest and the shortage of breath I had so I made my way across the dance floor to the bar where Kells stood and gently tapped him on the shoulder and told him I needed air outside and the proceeded to find the quickest way out of there.

Standing outside in the cold leaning my back on the bricks of the club's wall I slide down the wasp and crouch with just the tops of my feet on the floor. Small footsteps begin to head in my direction and I don't even look up as it could be anyone just leaving the club, but it's not it's the badass drummer who has became the reason I get up in the morning.

Silently he sits down next to me and sees a shiver escape my body and still wordlessly he takes off his jacket and places it round my shoulders. This causes my to look up at him and mutter a quiet "thanks you" and he just nods in acceptance. "You wanna get a cab home or we gonna go back in there." He said with a look of care and concern on his face, it was nice having someone finally care about me. "Can we go home?" I asked pleadingly. "Of course." Was his soft reply and took out his phone to call a taxi.

When it arrived he held out his hand and I put my much smaller hand in his and gently he pulled me up from the ground. Once we were in the taxi, I turned around to face him and asked "why did you want to leave?" While staring into his eyes trying to detect the emotion in them.
"It was enough, I was ready to go home." He replied while looking at me. The taxi ride was longer that I expected and I must have started to drift off with my head on his shoulder and when the cab ground to a halt ,he paid the driver and carried me bridal style to the door and gently put my feet on the ground to open the door. Then when the door was open he picked me up again and walked upstairs and into the bathroom.

In the bathroom he closed the toilet lid and placed me down on top of it and grabbed a cloth and wet it and began to take off my minimal make up. It was such a sweet gesture and it warmed my heart.

After that he grabbed my hand and dragged me gently to his bedroom and walked back to the bathroom and got me a drink of water and one of his long t shirts. "Here, I think it's better if you stay here rather than by yourself if you don't want a repeat of earlier." From this statement I couldn't tell whether he meant the panic attack I nearly had today or the panic attacks I had in private all the time. Performing in an orchestra was relatively easy as you weren't always the centre of attention but now I had nothing to hide behind. "Thanks" I replied softly to him.

He lead me to his bed and sat at the foot of it as I sat on the other side, swinging my legs over the side to climb in, him copying my actions.

The small lamp sat on the dressing table suddenly went dark as I stayed up at the ceiling with blank eyes thinking about the events of the day. He rolled over and placed the chaste kiss to my forehead then proceeded to go to sleep. I lay thinking about that for many more months then fell into the deep abyss of sleep.