Cover-up

The Poop

"Desperation makes the unthinkable thinkable."

Slowly making its way through the dark, twisty passageway, helped along by the undulating muscles of the enclosing walls, the log rounded a corner to descend into a new gloom. By entering that final void — a staging area of sorts — the log triggered a chain-reaction; a process that was now impossible to stop. Once begun, the process had to run its full course to an unavoidable conclusion.

...

The first contraction began at 2 pm. The pressure, although subtle at first, gradually increased, building to a climax after 45 seconds, then immediately subsiding only to return two minutes later for its reprisal. This pattern was all reasonable and consistent with the exception that today, the contractions began early, before the school day had ended. Sam's bowel movements were regular most days. Last night's dinner, however, had placed Sam in a dire situation that required him to eat a hamburger and gave him no opportunity to vomit discretely. The meat and accompanying stress had clogged his system, and now he suffered its consequences. Ever since his bunny died, Sam had been a closet vegetarian. To maintain his secret, he occasionally found himself in an unfortunate situation where he could neither avoid eating meat nor purge himself of the vile flesh.

"Oh, God! Oh, God, No! Don't let this happen! Please, don't let this happen here." Sam pleaded silently to whatever deity was listening. Sam was not a religious boy, but today found himself praying with the passionate fervor of a true believer. Sitting in his fourth-grade classroom with eighteen minutes remaining before the end of the school-day, Sam felt an onerous burden crawling deep in his bowels. His pattern of defecation was consistent once it began. The time from the first contraction until the final purge was about fifteen minutes. Once the buildup began, Sam could delay its conclusion by no more than a few minutes.

As Sam matured, he continued to refine and improve his ability to cover up mistakes, but he had no idea how to cover up this mess if it came to pass. Being a shy boy, Sam was socially withdrawn and shunned attention whenever possible. Sam had an irrational obsession with hiding his mistakes from others that began the day he murdered his pet bunny. His fear of embarrassment was a rationalization for hiding mistakes. Today's upcoming event, however, was capable of causing extraordinary humiliation.

Sam hated to poop at school. The first and only time he did so, the other kids had taken turns entering the stall next to his, standing on the toilet lid, and peering over the wall to watch him. They made their stupid faces that infuriated him so much. Sam didn't like that. He didn't like that at all. He needed privacy to poop and was unable to find any privacy at school. Today, he found himself in a desperate situation. Sam had maybe twelve minutes before the unthinkable happened and seventeen more minutes remained until the school day ended. In desperation, Sam decided that having other kids watch him poop from the neighboring stall was preferable to pooping in his pants in the middle of the classroom. It's odd how desperation expands the range of actions we are willing to take.

Sometimes facial expressions and body language communicate a message much more clearly and accurately than any corresponding spoken communication. The implied meanings of trembling hands, panicked eyes, stuttering voice are all there to tell the real story. Unfortunately for Sam, he had nearly perfected his ability to hide his internal distress in situations where he had forewarning.

In his calmest demeanor, Sam stood from his desk and unhurriedly walked to his teacher's desk. Standing there, in front of his teacher's desk, he waited for her to look up from her crossword puzzle. Sam awkwardly waited in silence as his teacher wrote a word into her crossword puzzle, paused, then erased it and wrote in a different word. Satisfied with her choice, she drew a line threw the question.