Act One, Scene One

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[Setting: A desk and typewriter take center stage alongside two chairs: a desk chair and a dining room chair. There are several reams of paper in a stack beside the desk, novels next to said papers in a stack. They are the novels of the two authors sitting in the chairs, although the names of the authors on the books are different. The trash basket is overflowing with crumpled and ripped sheets of paper stained with ink. The two authors sit in silence staring at the typewriter.]

Smith: We have to write something

Doe: But what?

Smith: Something.

[Doe starts to type]

Smith: No.

Doe: Why not?

Smith: Not enough depth.

Doe: Perhaps.

Smith: What about us?

Doe: What?

Smith: What if we wrote about us?

Doe: I suppose.

[Doe rips the paper from the typewriter and insert a clean sheet and types for a moment]

Doe: How does this work?

Smith: Not terribly hard.

Doe: How should we continue?

Smith: We can just talk until we think of something. Let's just give it a rest for a moment.

[Beat]

[Doe starts to type again]

Doe: Why haven't we tried technical writing?

Smith: It's inherently boring, besides we're paperback writers, not academics.

Doe: Right but-

Smith: But what?

Doe: Couldn't we do some technical writing about writing? Like how to write a book or something?

Smith: Like a guide?

Doe: Something like that, yes.

Smith: Pass.

Doe: Why?

Smith: I hated them in school.

Doe: Like you even read them.

Smith: I did read them, I just, never got it.

Doe: Got what?

Smith: I don't know. Don't you think it's hypocritical to tell someone how to write?

[Doe sighs and looks at Smith with annoyance]

Doe: We'll talk about this later.

[the scene goes dark and the sound of the typewriter keys fills the air]

The Unfinished Dialogues of Smith and DoeWhere stories live. Discover now