I just.. I feel so alone.. like a broken toy with a missing piece.. except I know exactly where my missing piece is.. but I'm not allowed to have it.. it's like we're both missing a piece and we're each other's missing piece but over time we change and no longer fit in that hole that the other has but there's still that feeling of brokenness and knowing there's a part of you out there, also broken but you just can't fix it because it just can't be fixed and God I just want to be in your arms, you holding me and making me feel whole again.. but I know that'll just hurt you in the end because you're trying so hard to make me happy when you can barely feel that yourself and I can only be a temporary fix when temporary doesn't work for me.. we both need a permanent fix and we can't get it because I don't want to hurt you while you're trying to make me better.. I don't want you to break yourself even more just to fix me.. yet while this happens it's like I'm breaking myself to fix you and God I just hate it.. why can't this just be like a perfect world for once and we can both get our happy endings together like we dreamed of after that first year together.. I just hate this feeling of emptiness when I know the rest of me is right within reach.. God I was supposed to go to sleep but now.. now I'm crying my eyes out while writing what I'm too scared to tell you.. I'm too scared to tell you how empty I feel without you.. because it'll just hurt us both in the end...
