I would rather end it all tonight

856 31 20
                                    

Aye, so my friend Ashlee and I made an agreement that I wouldn't update until she did but she said I can update again! Yay! This is going to be the last chapter and I'm so sad it's going to end, but I might make a sequel, depending on how well y'all take the ending of this. So, here it goes, love you all :*

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~ Paige's POV ~

After school

I was laying in my room, crying my eyes out. Vic had kissed Lisa and broke me. When I met him, I didn't know if I should have trusted him or not, and I made the poor decision to trust him. I had a feeling that I would get hurt, I always got hurt. I heard the front door open then close and I prepared myself to face Vic. I didn't want to face him, I knew I wouldn't be able to handle it, but this time, I couldn't let myself stick around to get hurt longer than I needed to.

"Paige," I heard Vic say as he opened my bedroom door. I was laying down, facing the wall.

"Paige, why'd you leave early? I was worried sick until I called Sally and she said that you left early." Vic said as the other side of the bed sunk down.

I didn't reply, I didn't know what I was going to say to him, and I didn't know how either. "I know you're awake, what's wrong?"

I sat and and looked at Vic, and I could tell that he then knew I was crying. "Babe, what happened?"

"I don't know Vic, what happened? What happened between you and Lisa earlier, and how long has it been going on?" I said full of emotion, I was about to burst into tears, but I held them back this time.

I could see Vic's face go from concerned, to scared. "What do you mean? There's nothing going on between Lisa and I, I swear. I hate Lisa with everything I have inside me." Vic said as he reached for my hand, but I pulled it back.

"Don't touch me, and something is going on. I saw you two kiss today in the hall. I'm not stupid, Vic. I know better than to believe lies. I'm done believing everything that you say, you built me up, you helped me, you made me like myself again, then you went and ruined that. You crushed me and I don't think you care. You certainly don't act like you care. I hate you Vic." I spat at Vic.

Vic seemed taken back by my sudden anger. "Paige, I tried to push her off me, I swear. I would never hurt you, I would never even try to hurt you. I love you too much to do that. I love you with my whole heart!" Vic said frantically.

"You didn't act like it! It didn't even look like you were trying to push her off! Your hands were by your sides!" I said, tears finally escaping my eyes.

"Why won't you believe me? I love you Paige! I love you more than you will ever know!" Vic yelled at me.

I moved back away from Vic and looked at him with disgust and anger. He yelled at me. He yelled at me and cheated on me and probably lied to me about everything as well.

"I don't want to see you right now," I spat at him before I grabbed my phone and ran out of the room.

I grabbed my shoes and tried to put them on really fast, but failed. When I finally got them on, I felt Vic grab my arm really tight. "Vic! Let go!" I shrieked.

My arm was in pain and Vic wasn't letting go. "Paige! I. Love. You!" Vic yelled again. "Please believe me..." He whispered the ending part.

"Fine! Just, please let me go." I said in barely above a whisper.

Vic let me go and leaned in for a kiss, I took the chance and ran out the door, leaving Vic in the apartment.

I ran to the restaurant that Sally worked at and hid in the back. I was allowed back there, behind the place. Tears were running down my cheeks and I felt my heart break into a million more pieces. Not only did Vic cheat on me, but he broke his promise to me and yelled at me, then he grabbed my arm and I could feel it bruising.

I fell to the ground and sobbed. I didn't know what to do, Vic, the only person I ever loved except my sister, betrayed me and I couldn't do anything about it. Why not join the only girl that never hurt me? I had plenty of reasons to end everything, I had no reasons to stay, I knew I wanted to end it.

I stood up and wiped my tears before I felt my phone vibrate. I saw Vic's name. I answered the phone," What do you want?" I snapped.

"I want to know where you're at! Please don't do anything stupid!" I heard Vic say frantically.

I thought of a quick lie. "I'm going back to my parents' house." I said.

"What? No! Don't be stupid!" Vic said.

"Goodbye Vic," I said before I hung up the phone.

I knew that by telling Vic that I was heading to my parents' house that he would go that way. I knew what I had to do.

I started walking back toward the apartment and when I got there, it was empty. I grabbed six bottles of pills and went into my room. I grabbed a sharpened pencil and began to write.

hey guys, looks like I'm writing another note. Hah, seems like only yesterday I was writing my last one. Anyway, when I met Vic, things changed for the better, I became happy, I learned to love myself, I began to eat, and I lost those suicidal thoughts too. I thought I could be happy forever, but I was wrong. I lost my memory and I got those feelings back, I hated myself again, I stopped eating again, I became suicidal again. I started warming up again and when I remembered my past, things got better for me and I was glad... I threw out my blades and got much better. But here I am, writing another suicide note. Why? Because I lost it.

Mike, be the drummer I know you can be. Promise me that you will live your dream and make sure that you do anything if it makes you happy. I want you to live your life to the fullest, but please try not to hurt Sally, I don't need my other sister hurting like Jessica used to... I'm sorry I'm leaving, but I'm broken and I can't do it anymore...

Jaime, Once again, you're the best friend I could have ever asked for. I love you man, like my brother of course, oh and your bass playing skills are amazing. Please, please, please don't be mad at me... You're the best friend I've ever had and I can't even explain how much you mean to me... I never wanted to leave my best friend, but I don't want to die either, I just want to end my pain.. Promise that you'll find a girl you love, treat her right, and one day marry her... Promise me that. I love you Hime, and I'm so, so, so, sorry.

Tony, Star Wars... Don't forget that it was out thing, make sure you get enough Star Wars tattoos for the both of us.. I'm sorry Turtle, goodbye...

Sally, you're the best sister (that's not biological) that I could ask for.. You were almost as close to me as Jessica was.. I love you and I'm sorry, but I'm finally going to see Jessica again.. Goodbye..

Jordan, Doctor who was our thing and I need you to promise me that you'll never stop watching it. I hope that you and Tony make it, unlike Vic and I. You deserve happiness

Vic, you hurt me.. It wasn't my parents or Lisa this time, it was you... You cheated on me with Lisa then yelled at me and grabbed my arm.. It left a bruise, Vic... You always promised that you wouldn't yell at me or hurt me, but here we are... You made me love myself, you made me think people actually cared, you made me start eating, but then, you crushed me.. You ruined whatever self confidence I had... I only ever truly trusted you other than Jaime, but he wasn't my boyfriend. I gave myself to you, I loved you with my whole heart... My love for you was bulletproof but you're the one who shot me...

I choked on tears as I folded the note up and placed it on my bed. I was going to leave the people I cared about, to see my sister again... I missed Jessica so much and I couldn't handle Vic cheating on me.

I opened some of the pill bottles and grabbed a full water bottle. I put most of the pills in my mouth and swallowed. I became really dizzy and I started shaking . I fell to the ground shaking and my eyelids became heavy. I closed my eyes and felt myself falling asleep.

I knew I'd be gone by the time I was found.

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