What have we here?{oneshots}

JohnDave

DAVE STRIDER sits in his boring-ass Texan sauna of an apartment. Doing what you may ask? Drinking. Fucking. Apple juice while exploring the Internet, looking at random shit. He sighs and gets up from his computer and goes to get more Apple juice. He kicks away a few smuppets on his way to the fridge. Once the knight received his piss-like reward he returned to his computer to see his pesterchum flashing. He's received a message

[ ectoBiologist started pestering turntechGodhead at 12:23 ]

EB: hi Dave!

TG: oh hey man

EB: whats up? :D

TG: a ceiling

EB: smart-ass

TG: yup

TG: so why are you messagin me?

EB: I wanted to say hi to my best bro!

EB: we are bros right?

TG: yeah man of course

EB: great!

EB: so what are you doing?

TG: being pestered by a dork

TG: being ironic

TG: and drinking apple juice

TG: wbu

EB: talking to my best bro!

EB: and watching some movies which are surprisingly not entertaining me

TG: no nic?

EB: he's in this one but it's just

EB: not entertaining

TG: and con-air was?

EB: it was! Until I realized that it's pretty stupid

TG: that was like your biggest and greatest realization ever

EB: shut up!

TG: you don't want me to

EB: oh haha very funny Dave

TG: as always man

EB: whatever keep thinking your funny and cool

TG: dude I'm cool as hell

EB: mhm sure

TG: we've established this man

TG: I'm fucking amazing

EB: yeah you are

TG: wait what?

EB: nothing!

TG: okay then

TG: whyd you message me in the first place? And give a good reason other than boredom

EB: well I just wanted to talk to you

EB: I was hoping we could hang out sometime soon

TG: dude fuck yes

TG: get yo ass over here egderp

EB: fine

EB: but after my movie

TG: I thought you said it was boring?

EB: it is but I can't resist a nic cage movie