Good enough// jack x kai

2- reasons

Jack 16/04/21

It's around five months since I talked Kai down from that dreaded bridge and despite his insistence that he would only stay a month he stayed many more. I wake up at around nine am, I hear Kai pottering around the house. He's an interesting guy and although I try not to pry, curiosity runs through my veins. Why did he want to end his life, what was it that effected him so strongly that it drove him to kill himself?, to want to die? I haul my body out of bed stretching my limbs. Walking downstairs I greet Kai. " mornin'" he says cheerily. I sit down to a fine meal of Cheerios and chat lazily with Kai.

" so how you feeling" I question 

"Good!" He answers, 

"You've lived with me five months"

"Really.? It seems like yesterday..." his voice trailed over as a silence falls over the room as we both flash back to that day 

I was on the commute to the shop across the bridge. I always liked it in the early morning. Quiet, peaceful. My heart skipped a beat as I saw a hooded figure with his toes on the edge of the ledge of the bridge. My hand just reached out, I grabbed him. It was an impulse I guess. I didn't know him but I felt drawn to him, I had to save him if I didn't I dunno what I'd do, with that guilt hanging over me, like a grey cloud. 

And so he came home with me and the rest is history.

I am so greatful he came home with me, he's my best frenid and roomie and I love it.still the question hangs in the air. 

Why did sweet lovely innocent little Kai want to die??

" why were you there Kai, you don't have to answer I just wanted to know"

" it's not a pleasant story to tell but I'll tell you if you really want, I trust you jack, you see many years ago I met milo, he was my five year long boyfriend. We were in love then one day something in him snapped, he became angry, violent. He'd hit me hold me against walls throw me around like a rag doll. And that wasn't even the worst part. " he sighs, the tears welling in his eyes, " he would tell me awful things call me awful names make me feel like I had the worth of nothing, like I was worthless, he made me want to die, with his words. He always spoke with venom dripping from his tongue the last time I saw him, he called me a worthless piece of shit and told me I should kill myself, I tried to get past the pain but it followed me the sound of his voice infected my head and I couldn't breathe at some times I just wanted out, I wanted to be free, I wanted to be numb. Then I met you and it felt like everything clicked into place. Like it was meant to happen" I smiled sadly " Destiny " we said in unison. I enveloped  him in a hug. Milo was a foul creature how could he treat someone so kind and sweet and gorgeous so horribly. If I had the chance to be with Kai I would hold him and never let go. But he's not mine