My Diary

1.

Hi, I am Katie.Walters1213, I guess. To understand me you might need some background, my parents are divorced, and my mom is happy and remarried, to the love of her life, my step-dad. Which leads to my next point. I am a strong believer of soulmates, I believe God made every ones other half and they will meet at some point in their lives. Oh, I am also Christian. Don't hate or judge. I also support other groups like LGBT+ and I am ok if you have a different religion, I have lived with it my whole life. You will meet different people through out your life one way or another you are going to have to accept people are going to have different looks, beliefs, fandoms, sexuality, etc. Too be honest, these things don't effect how I see a person, unless THEY want me too see them differently. I think a person is a person. This one is just a random thing I love to say. "there are no bad people only poor choices." So if you screw up, so what? We are human. 

Anyway here is my real rant. You can call me crazy, stupid, unrealistic, but I need help or a sign. So, when I was little I wanted nothing more than to have a boyfriend, like the real couple goals boyfriend. I now discovered that this was due to the fact my dad was physically present just not emotionally. I imagined my soulmate all the time. I would "talk to him" every night and look at the moon, like I was talking to the moon, and I would imagine him looking at the moon, talking to me.  I made a list of the traits I wanted him to have and built it up over the years and NEVER showed anyone. Just me, myself, and I. Until today, I am going to tell you what is on my list.

1. He had to be Christian; one quote I always have in my head is, "Soulmate, Find Him (God), find yourself, then come find me." I live by this quote when if comes to love. 

2. Understanding,he has to understand my weirdness, and I want to be myself around him, and feel safe to express my point of view.

3. He has to fun/funny, like got to Disney world/ ComicCon with me, do random videos and TikToks with me, I know I am a child on the inside. 

And the list goes on all the way down to his personality and looks. I know he has brown fluffy hair I can play with, and blue eyes, he doesn't need glasses but he looks good in them, and looks good in a baseball cap, for when I take him to baseball games, he would look really hot in a Spider-man costume; don't ask, I also know he has the choice of millions of girls, like girl swoon over him, but he will choice me. Its sounds like any romantic teen movie ever, but you know. I also imagined meeting him and one day showing him my list, and him telling/showing me his and it would be me to a T. I also have a list of all the things I want to do with him, which is for a another time. Seem unrealistic, but I know everyone has a soulmate that fits there list, you just haven't found them yet. The book, The Chase by Kyle and Kelsey Kupecky showed me that.  

Anyway, I think I found him; my soulmate....The problem? He live around the country from me, doesn't know I exist, I am just another person in his comment section. Long story short, I found him on Social Media, I know people act different on camera than in real life, but he matches my list, as far as I know I haven't met him and he hasn't reached out to me so I am on the fence about it. I pray for signs and they seem to point to him, but I want to know if it is just my head and feelings saying he is the one or if it really is God giving a sign. Anyway, it has been almost 6 months and I am still in my head about this. Like, I am getting mixed signs about it, like he will post something when I pray for a sign, but when I pray for him to contact me or notice me, he kinda does but it's not personal, for example he will like my comment. But, not to sound petty I want him to call me out of his 5K followers/subscribers. You know? I need some advice, pray for me or let me know if you found a sign for me. I need advice/help/a sign. 

Thank you for reading my crazy, idoitic, unrealistic dreams

PS If you have an idea who it is leave a comment, if you get the guess right, I will tell everyone you got it right, and post who it is, and post the link to this dairy and send it to him, I am doing this mainly because I know he won't find this/click on this. I am also posting,  anonymously so it should be ok...right? He will never find this or know who it is. Right?