n. a recurring thought that only seems to strike you late at night-an overdue task, a nagging guilt, a looming and shapeless future-that circles high overhead during the day, that pecks at the back of your mind while you try to sleep, that you can s...
he laughed my darling you will never be unloved by me you are too well tangled in my soul. - atticus
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•••
|| the second part of sneaky, ||
i stared out the window of the station, watching as the snow covered ground passed. i had left the club far earlier then i wanted too, and because of it i felt off, sort of anxious.
i looked over the station seats, only now noticing the usually occupied seat being empty. i had no one to blame but myself for that one. if i had stayed later maybe my entertainment would be here, whining to "iwa-chan," somebody i had yet to meet.
i couldn't blame myself for ease dropping, he was so loud, and so hilariously obnoxious.
the train ride quickly came to an end, and as i left the open doors of the station, i couldn't help but feel just a little more worse for wear.
•••••
i had quickly finished up in the club room, tidying up some of the paints. the art room laid barren, and my art block still ate away at me. this was the third week in a row that i wasn't able to even start a painting, let alone think about it.
so i did the only sensible thing i could.
i walked over to the gym room doors, watching in quiet patience as i watched oikawa- my station buddy- hit a perfect serve. it slapped against the ground, and i couldn't help the clapping that broke out across my hands.
the team, mostly oikawa, had turned over to look at whoever was clapping, which caused him to miss a ball. the team inwardly groaned, but me and oikawa remained in tight eye contact.
i waved, heading into the gym further. i sat down on the bottom set of the bleachers, my backpack beside me.
oikawa looked away, only now beginning the game. i watched in what i only knew was blatant idiocy. i knew nothing about volleyball, and only cheered when oikawa very noticeable fan base cheered- which was the only real way i knew what was going on.
the game had quickly come to a close, and so had my watching. i packed up, and left. what i wasn't expecting was for the hazelnut haired male to take down the hallway after me.
"hey!" i turn around, and before i know it i'm being pushed to the ground, shoved almost. "i was gonna say wait up, but i guess this works perfectly." he laughed, before pulling away.
"hello," i smiled, getting up from the ground. "nice to see you too." we both laughed, and before i knew it the pair of us were back on our feet. "i told you i would come visit you one day, surprise you just like you did for me."
"i guess i just wasn't expecting it." he relies, and i watch anxiously as he taps his fingers against his legs.
"i always keep my word," i say, running my hand through my hair. "so what's up? what'd you come all the way down the hallway for?"
"i was gonna ask you to wait for me to finish cleaning up, i figured we'd both walk to the transit together?" he phrased the statement as more of a question, and i laughed softly.
"was that a question or a-" but before i can finish my sentence oikawa's head is smacked forward, and my hand is slapped by a white volleyball.
"iwa-chan!" oikawa calls out loudly, rubbing his head briskly.
"come help clean up," he says strictly, clapping his hands together. "or do you want another one of those?"
i laugh, so so hard. for the very little amount of time that i had known oikawa i could tell he deserved it.
"so you're the mysterious iwa-chan i've heard so much about." i smile, waving towards the other male. "i'm oikawa's transit buddy."
"i guess i am," he's twisting the volleyball in between his hands, smiling at me in return. "it was nice putting a face to a name, oikawa always talk about the pretty girl at the station."
"no i don't!" oikawa hollers, his cheeks slightly red.
"i'll let you two clean up," i chuckle, already hearing the question that's gonna come out of oikawa's mouth. "i'll be waiting for you outside the gym doors, number one."
•••••
"when's your next game?" i ask quietly, turning to look over at oikawa. there's a nervous look on his face, but i decide to ignore it.
"sometime next week, but it's only a practice one against a rivalling school." he relies, looking up at the sky almost childishly.
"maybe i'll come watch," i smile, watching as oikawa looks at me agape. "my blank canvas can wait a bit."
"really?" he childishly says, almost screaming. i watch as he runs down the street, kicking his feet up and down. but then he realizes i'm still here, and he calms down, and waits for me to catch up. "sorry."
i'm laughing, quietly grabbing at oikawa's hand as we enter the transit.
"so," i rely, tapping my free hand against my leg. "who's this pretty girl at the station i've heard so much about?"
"well," oikawa starts, dragging out the 'l' in the word almost obnoxiously. "she's incredibly beautiful, and i think you know her very well."
"do i," i state, pinching the bridge of my nose.
"she's holding my hand right now," he states, and i almost scream as his hand reaches into mine, i let go, and he holds his own hand. "guess who it is?"
"you rat!" i chuckle, hitting the side of his shoulder.
"it's me!" he announces, and i smile feverishly.
"and to think i was gonna share my milk bread with you!" i pause, turning my head away from him.
"please!" he announces, and i watch as he almost gets on his knees. "i'm sorry, you were always the pretty girl from the station!"
"damn right i am," i smile, grabbing the package of bread from my bag. "what's the magic word?"
"please?" he laughs, and i pretend to hand him the bread, but as soon as he reaches for it i pull it away.
"nope," i laugh, eating the piece i offered him nimbly. "it was lotion."
"what!" he hollers again, trying his best to reach the bread that's on my lap.
"but because i'm feeling nice, here." i say, handing him the piece of milk bread softly. "i guess you were well behaved enough for milk bread."
