The Tomes of Allagan: Vol 3

How to Improve Self-Confidence

The first steps towards achieving self confidence is having a positive view of yourself. You won't attain a more prideful vibe if you see yourself in a negative way. Find something small about you that you like. Doesn't matter what it is, just anything at all that you genuinely like about yourself. Once you've found it, begin to search for a second thing. Then a third. Then a fourth, and so on until you cannot find anything you like anymore. This might seem silly, but it gets you to really think about yourself and consider things normally taken for granted or seen as insignificant. Now that you have compiled a list of the things that make you happy with yourself, take a look at what doesn't make you happy. Write down everything about yourself that you do like and everything you don't. Look in the mirror and examine each aspect of both lists.

Now determine why exactly you don't like whatever it is you don't like. Is it weight? If so, why? You are how you are, why should it bother you? Want to be thinner or bigger? Go out and make the effort to change. We are at a point in history where you have the ability to make a change in some way, shape, or form, in order to be the best you you can be. Of course this will require effort, as it won't come to you freely. Perhaps you are filled with insults or negative things that others have said about you in the past. Why should it bother you? Billions of people exist, plenty will try to tear you down. Find someone who can help build you up. The more the merrier, but just find someone who sees the good in you and can bring it out. Now this might not work. I am an example; I have a handful of people I believe truly care about me and see the good in me, though my own mind prevents me from seeing myself in any light. I also know someone who has a similar issue as me, and I seek only the best for them and hope they can see themselves one day as I see them, a kind hearted and one of a kind person. I've never given up one someone whom I truly believe deserves to see themselves better than how they do. I honestly don't like when people bash themselves or have depression for silly or unnecessary reasons. Why see yourself so poorly when you have so much potential? Now I have to mention that how I view myself isn't unjustified; I analyze my character as well as my decisions and mentality, and combined with my past and where I seem to be in life, I am able to determine just how much I'm actually worth as a person. As of this very moment, and the usual result I come up with, I consider myself insignificant. Keep in mind, I have plenty of reasons as to why, and this isn't something I take lightly. That being said, I still make the concious effort to help others in anyway I can, and do my best to bring others up.

I don't believe self wallowing is an excuse for neglecting others and preventing yourself from having the confidence you should have. Everyone has bad days, and sees themselves worse than what they are. The problem comes in when they continue to see themselves this way and never finding a way past it. I have met countless amounts people, and while I do believe some have signifcant more amounts of work that needs to be done, I have yet to encounter a single individual that I believe is beyond repair. The first step towards a brighter tomorrow is the willingness to try and take that first step. You may fall, but you can always get back up and keep trying. Find the things that make you happy and boost your self esteem and let the happiness they bring flow within you. You deserve to be happy, and regardless of what anyone tells you, you matter to someone and have value in more eyes than your own. Use that value, and let it build you up and create a better you. Become the person you want to be, and not the person other people make you. Believe in yourself, and recognize that you have the capability to make a change in this world in anyway you see fit. Most importantly, remember that you matter, you are important, and no matter how horrible life gets you always have the ability to keep going.