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And so life went on. The boy named Gyu stayed stuck in my head for two days but slowly faded to the back of my mind.

I tried my best to not think about him, because every time I did, my hands trembled and my head became a jumbled mess. It was horrible.

"Soobin" Taehyun shuts my computer. He's lucky that I was on twitter and not working on my essay.

"Hm?" I push up my glasses with my index finger.

"Kai invited us over"

"Why?"

"They're having a kick back"

"Don't wanna" I throw my head back. I didn't want to see him. I didn't even want to be in the same vicinity as him.

Yet, here I am, standing in front of Huening Kai and Yeonjuns frat house. The Christmas lights were still hung up despite there being only two weeks of January left.

The house still smells like cinnamon, and the heat is still way too high.

I see him immediately. He wore a white fur coat, tight leather jeans, a tight sleeveless black silk shirt with a low collar, a sparkly choker and his bleached hair flat over his forehead; his bangs in his eyes.

He was sitting on the couch next to Yeonjun. A conversation taking place in the living room. My head feels as if I just spun around twelve times, and I feel like I'm actually going to throw up.

"Hey guys" Huening Kai approaches Tae and I. We ended up in the kitchen.

"How's your essay?" Kai asks us.

"I finished it but Soobin is procrastinating" Taehyun (who is currently on top of the kitchen counter and drinking out of a wine glass) bluntly puts it.

"Once I figure out how to start my stupid thesis then I'll be fine" I defended myself.

"Its due in two weeks" my best friend reminds me.

"How much pages does it have to be?" Kai questions.

"Eight" I say.

"If you want I can help you start it" Huening Kai offers.

"You don't have to-"

"Take the damn offer, you need it" Taehyun scolds me. I sigh and smile at Kai.

"Are you sure it's not a big deal?"

"Definitely not! You can come over tomorrow after your classes"

"Alright cool, thanks so much!"

"Okay lets go back now" Taehyun downs the rest of his drink and jumps off of the counter. Him and Huening Kai started moving towards the living room and I made up an excuse almost too naturally.

"I'm gonna go smoke a cig real quick" I jerk my thumb to the backdoor leading into the back yard.

"Of course you are" Taehyun mutters as he and Kai walk away.

I sat down on the swing set. The fraternity had one right next to the pool. They were yellow and the chains squeaked as I slowly swung my body back and fourth.

I light the cigarette between my lips and inhale deeply. I throw my head back and enjoy my high. When I get back up, I'm not alone anymore.

He's sitting on the swing next to me. I don't know how or when he got there, but he was fucking there, and he was looking at me.

There's an awkward silence between us. I, not knowing what to do, hold my breathe.

"Hey" He says

"Hey" It hurts to speak.

"Smoking is bad for you" he says, and it feels like my throat is closing. I can't breathe. He takes my breath away in the worst possible way but he is still so beautiful. He so beautiful that it terrifies me. He's so beautiful that I feel like it could kill me- I feel like he's going to kill me.

When a human is faced with a life threatening situation they either fight or flight.

So I ran.

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