Survivors Guilt - A HP Fan Fic

Chapter 1

Hayley shivered as she walked between classes, the wind buffeting at her uniform, chilling her to the bone. She jumped as a hand landed on her shoulder. Her hair was blown into her face as she turned to find out who the hand belonged to. The principal was standing there, face screwed up against the wind.

"Miss Sphinx. Can you come with me, please." He inquired, running a hand over his balding head. Hayley nodded her assent, and followed him to his office.

In the warmth of the office Hayley discovered she could breathe easier. She sat in the chair in front of his desk, waiting for him to address the reason he had pulled her aside right before Charms class. Her nerves were rising the longer he took to speak. It rose higher when he started with a sigh, and the words "this isn't easy to say."

"I wish I wasn't the one to have to tell you..." he began, then trailed off and sighed again. "There has been an incident," Hayley felt her mouth go dry, "it appears to have been a hate crime, and as much as we've tried to keep your family's, uh, situation, under wraps, someone has found out. I'm sorry but..." he trailed off again, then steeled himself. "There is no easy way to say it." He said again. "I'm sorry, but, your parents have been killed, your sister alongside them." He finished in a quiet sombre tone, quite flustered.

Hayley's only response was a sharp intake of breath. She felt as is she had been struck in the stomach, her safety blanket having been torn from underneath her feet. Her world was crumbling. There was a roaring in her ears, and the words coming from the principals mouth sounded like they were underwater. She grasped at straws, desperately trying to make sense of the information, trying to make the words mean anything else, anything but this. She couldn't be the sole survivor, she couldn't have survived her family at all, surely. She just couldn't be alone.

"Is there anyone I could contact for you?"

"M-my Aunty, Euphemia Potter, only she's in England." Hayley muttered, wrapping her arms around herself.

"I'll give her a call at once." Mr Smith responded, walking over to the lit fireplace.

***

Shortly afterwards, Hayley ran into her Aunt's open arms.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry. This is so awful!" She cried as she stroked her nieces hair, who wept into her chest. Euphemia Potter was struggling to hold back her own tears, Hayley's mother was her baby sister. Nothing else was said, standing in each others comforting embrace.

Once Hayley pulled away, Euphemia had disappeared into the principal's office, to "discuss adult things", as she had put it. Hayley figured she would be staying with her Aunt and Uncle now. She was almost an adult, 18 next January, but until then a year in England wouldn't be the worst thing, she thought. She wondered if perhaps she could ask to move her education to Hogwarts with her cousin for her final year. She didn't want to be here alone. Sobs wracked her body and she rocked back and forth in her chair, lost once more in her grief.

Hayley had worked so hard to keep their secret, to keep them safe. Though New Zealand had been largely untouched by the war waging in England's wizarding world, some of the nasty ideologies against Muggles and Squibs had leaked into the country. And now it seems, her family had paid the ultimate price for it.

The next week swirled by in muddy colours around her, too lost in her grief to be of much help in the organisation of the funeral. Even her favourite cousin, James couldn't bring her out of it. In between the flashbacks of relived memories, were flashbacks of when they'd gone through this before, with her other cousin, murdered for being a Muggle sympathiser.

The day of the funeral dawned, a grey overcast day, though the wind and rain had ceased. Fitting weather, James thought. He wiped away the tears as he walked down the hall to collect his cousin. Peering through the door he found her in a ball on her bed, wordlessly staring at the wall. His heart clenched seeing her like that. It wasn't that long ago that he'd been like that. He wiped another tear from his eye before entering her bedroom.

***

"Hayley dear!" Euphemia Potter began, her niece sat across the living room from her, cradling a cup of coffee. "How would you feel about transferring to James' school in September? I've already spoken to the headmaster about it, and he'll have you if you would go."

It was a week after the funeral, and the girl had come out of her shell a little. Becoming a little accustomed to her new reality.

"I've been meaning to ask you about that." Hayley said, leaving it at that.

"Good, I'll make the proper arrangements." Euphemia said after drinking the last of her own coffee. "I assume you already know the next thing I'm going to ask. Would you like to come stay with us then, at our home, you can decorate your bedroom however you like, and we've got our dear boy Sirius living with us too now, so you wouldn't be alone. Of course you can stay here if you would prefer."

"No, I'd like to come stay with you, thank you Aunt Phe." Hayley said, setting down her coffee cup. "When would we go?"

"Whenever you are ready, dear." Her Aunt replied gently.

"Now." bit.

"Now? Are you sure?" The response shocked Euphemia a bit.

"Yes, I'm already packed, James helped me." Her niece said pointing to the corner of the room where she had several suitcases.

"Sure thing, let me go get my things." Euphemia said, standing up. Hayley flicked her wand at the soiled mugs, and sent them to the kitchen where they began cleaning themselves.

***

"Your room is just in there." Fleamont Potter said, pointing to a door in the corridor. Hayley followed directions, and found herself in one of the guest bedrooms, her room now. The room had a queen bed in it, with a pretty duvet on it, a desk under the window, a set of drawers, and two doors on one wall. She began to unpack right away. She poked her head through one door, and discovered a wardrobe.

"Perfect." She murmured, turning around to grab the things that needed to be hung up. She jumped as she discovered a boy had snuck into her bedroom and was now sprawled across the bed. He had brown hair, that was a little shaggy and grey eyes. He seemed familiar, she had definitely seen him before. However she knew him straight away, for her Aunt had spoken of him. This was Sirius Black, James' best friend who lived with the Potters.

"Sirius! Leave her be!" A stern voice came from the doorway, where a frowning James was standing.

"Aww, but I wanted to introduce myself!" Sirius whined.

"No need for that. We've met, last Christmas." Hayley laughed. "But if it's introductions you want. Hi, I'm Hayley." She crossed the room and offered a hand to shake.

"Sirius." He took her hand and shook it.

"Pleasure to meet you. Now get out! No boys allowed!" Hayley finished the encounter, walking to the door to close it behind him. Once the boys were gone she sighed and collapsed on her bed, allowing the familiar waves of grief to wash over her.

Hey guys!

This is a reworked fan fiction that used to appear under the name Fail Llamas. The main character is the same, however the entire story is being rewritten, so I hope that you will treat this as a whole new story.

I hope you enjoy this new edition.

Cheers,
Jade (LlamaCat)