Type Hesitated

Type hesitated. He wasn't aware of what was holding him back. He'd spent the whole night in Pufai's company, it had been a nice evening to help a beautiful and sweet girl celebrate her birthday. Dinner was delicious, she'd accepted his plushy gift with a great smile and thanks, and the walk to her condo under the stars was romantic. Yet, he was feeling nothing close to romantic. He was feeling literally nothing.

The night had been completely comfortable. The young man, and young lady had laughed, teased, and flirted coyishly. Type knew without a doubt that Fai was into him. He was absolutely sure that he'd understood her ques indicating she was open to sleeping together. The idea appealed to him too. But...he was hesitating. Type was sure that when it came time to make it all clear, he'd be in the moment; there would be no stopping them having sex.

Fai was soft, beautiful, she liked him, the compliments swirled around his mind. She wasn't Tharn though. Unexpectedly his feelings focused on Tharn, his heart immediately pinched as if pained. The gay man was handsome, he was thoughtful, he'd helped Type find something in himself that he didn't realize was missing. Type had been with girls, he wasn't a virgin, but he'd never experienced sex the way he had with Tharn. Every time they did it there was intimacy, there was passion, and there was a feeling of giving pleasure together.

He would he feel that way with Fai, right? Once they started getting into the mood, it would come. Maybe the reason he'd never felt that way with other girls was because he'd been too immature. But this time with Fai, because of what he'd found with Tharn, things would be different. With Fai, he'd finally understand what it was to make love to someone.

The couple headed toward the birthday girls condo. Fai had taken Type's hand and gently pulled him along to the buildings entrance. Type's feet seemed weighted. As if they were encased in 50 pounds of cement; he could barely shuffle them. Why was he unable to lift them, to move forward and follow this gorgeous woman?

"Type?" she asked casually.

The soft question jolted him from his thoughts. He smiled to assure her. Clutching her hand firmly, forging the resolve to move straight ahead.

"Are you okay?" she tentatively asked.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine." He wondered if she thought his answer sounded unsure so he quickly made more conversation. "This building is really nice."

"I moved in right at the beginning of the term. I was lucky to get such a nice place. I'd looked at the dorm but they are rather shabby."

Type nodded in agreement. But kept his face neutral. He didn't really share her thoughts on the dorm. When they moved in, his and Tharn's room was clean and had everything they needed, kitchenette, private bathroom, study desks, a sitting area. They'd never felt cramped in the single living area, even when Type was doing everything to make Tharn move out. It had been spacious enough to easily move the beds together after Type made his one time proposition, to have sex just once, as a way to clear a debt. A one time, that turned into a first time. With a second, third, and fourth time quickly following.

His eyes shot wide. Why did he just go there? Type inhaled sharply. The same way he had when Tharn would sniff at his throat. It had not taken his body long to learn that when Tharn did that, it was only the beginning of his ministrations. Type's heart pounded rhythmically against his ribs.

"Type?" Fai called again, there was a hint of annoyance.

"Yes?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yes. I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" more annoyance.

"Yes." He touched her shoulder to assure her. "I'm sorry. I'm just ...looking at your place. The way you decorated it. It's nice."