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at this point there were no tears left to cry.
the raven-haired male sobbed miserably as numerous tears trailed down his pale skin like a broken faucet. he felt his heart clench in despair that suffocated him to even inhale a waft of air.
the throbbing pain residing inside his head was nothing compared to his aching heart. a piercing scream left his wobbling lips as he hoped it would cease all the pain but oh how erroneous he was.
"why? why?!"
the sound of the door being opened abruptly interrupted his cries. jeonjeongguk felt his aching body collide onto the mattress beside him in absolute devastation, wanting to leave this cruel world for the good.
"jeongguk!? what the fuck!"
from the corner of his teary eyes he could decipher a blurry sight of his roommate rush towards him whilst muttering profanities under his breath incoherently. his roommate- hoseok held the younger by his shoulders and shook him violently, only to be replied with his broken whimpers.
"hyung...i've lost....i lost to him..a-again."
jeongguk's sore throat burned as those unfathomable words escaped his mouth in between hiccups. hoseok sighed before settling himself beside him and pulled him into to a warm embrace, cradling the boy softly.
"shhhh."
a while later the younger slowly seemed to lessen his cries as he dropped his head on the crook of hoseok's neck. the soothing rubs on his back made it easier for him to respire and he finally locked his bloodshot eyes with those soft brown, reassuring ones.
their surroundings were densely dark, the dull moonlight was the only source of illumination and jeongguk pondered how the older's eyes gleamed in the dark⎯ seemingly winning over the bright stars.
"i'm sorry."
the guilt hit him up real bad and it worsened when the latter merely gave him a sweet smile.
he hated times like this, he hated how he always had to bother hoseok with all his miseries but deep down his heart he knew the latter didn't mind, he knew hoseok wouldn't mind him wetting his shirt or even draining his time as all his heart ever held was the purity to help others.
and oh how jeongguk wished he could also reach out to favour people but too bad, he himself was wounded to heal other's pain, he himself needed a helping hand.
"i'm a fool aren't i?"
a dry chuckle left his lips when hoseok shook his head as a response with a bewildered expression plastered on his face.
"i am hyung, i am. it's funny how i don't even mend my mistakes."
"no jeongguk, don't say that. every single breathing soul in this world are bound to make mistakes. no one is perfect, we all have our flaws guk but the way you embrace them will always be appreciated by the people around you. please don't ever blame yourself for everything."
he couldn't help but smile at his hyung's innocence and it pained him to know that he was being an unbearable burden to him.
"but hyung, what i did has no turning back. i fell for him. i fell into his deceiving trap, not once but twice." ____________________________________
