If not us, who? If not now, when? | Muke Clemmings

Chapter 11

Song ideas for this part:
- Bad Enough For You - All Time Low
- Get Down On Your Knees And Tell Me You Love Me - All Time Low

Michael's POV
I came in the house of that psychiatrist, Mrs Jones. She is a tall, thin, blond women. A lot of normal guys would just think about her boobs and things. And all I could think about was Luke. Fuck you Luke.
"Welcome Michael! I'm Antonia Jones and I will help you to get this through this difficult period of your life.", Antonia said with a determined voice.
"Thank you...", I almost whispered. I didn't know what to answer or what should I even say. I thought with every word I say she will read my mind and realize that I had this... obsession with my best friend. And I didn't want that. I just want to forget about my feelings about Luke 'cause I don't want to ruin his life. My life is already ruined, so if I can save him, that would be amazing...
"So, I need you to be always opened to me, you don't have to feel stupid or awkward, I'm here just to help you and lead you to the right way.", she said and I felt in her voice like she said this sentence a billion times before.
This time I was completely clueless about what should I answer, so I just nodded.
"Now, please, tell me..."

I could tell this women was trying so hard to get something from me but I didn't want to talk to her. I didn't want anyone to know how weird and different I really am...
"Michael... I can't help you if you don't want to talk... but... If it easier for you, here hold this.", she gave me a small notebook, "write down your feelings every day. Imagine you are writing letters to someone who you really love... it can be your brother, sister, best friend, mother... You will carry it with you and only you and I will read it. Is that a better variant?"
I nodded and someone ringed on the door...I can't believe an hour passed this quickly! I went out of that darkened modern room to sunny driveway. Ashton was standing there, smiling at me. I said goodbye to Antonia and went to the car while Ash was talking to her.
You looked at me with those beautiful stupid blue eyes and you were full of questions. I didn't wanted to talk about me. I was just acting like everything is fine, I was smiling, singing lyrics of random songs on the radio... Just because I don't want you to worry about me.

Michael came in the car and he looked really fine. He looked better than ever. To be real, that was scaring shit out of me. How can somebody be that good at once? I forced myself to believe that it's only my stupid imagination, that he is really doing fine because I clearly enjoyed more in his smile and happy voice than his sad, red eyes.
"So... How are you?", I asked first question and I was full of them. I really worried about Mikey and I really want to show him that I'm always here.
"How do I look? I'm doing great!", he smiled weakly and tried to carry away with lyrics of I miss you.
"Hey guys, let's get some pizza tonight at Mila's!", I said to everyone in the car, while Ash was getting inside. I looked at him with a question face: Is everything fine? and he just closed his eyes and shook his head with a smile sigh... What on Earth?! I can't take this, I think I will freak out!
"Yeah, that would be amazing, what do you think Mikey?", Calum asked while Michael was looking through the window, quietly singing, obviously lost in his own thoughts. I put my hand on his shoulder, 'causing him to bounce a bit.
"Yeah, huh, what?", Michael looked at us confused.
"Luke asked do we want to go to Mila's tonight and get some pizza, do you want to?", Calum put on his puzzled look.
"Um... I...", Michael was out of words.
"Leave this boy relax a bit tonight guys.", Ashton was really serious and this situation was more than hard to me. Normal Ashton would never be serious. He would always giggle and share positive energy.
"Yes... I want to relax a bit... If you don't mind guys?", Michael said, still having a small smile on his face.
"Alright bro", I smiled. What else should I say anyway?

Soon we were in front of Michael's house, Karen was waiting for him, nervous like a butterfly. He sent us a smile wave before getting in his house. Calum and I turned to Ashton, waiting for a explanation of this situation...

ღAuthors noteღ
Happy Friday everyone! Another school week and this s*it is oveeeerrr !!