Secrets Are

Book 2: Secrets Are Perfect | Chapter 5

The doorbell to the Morgans' house rang just then, which meant it either had to be Natalie, Brooke, Nick, or my grandparents. Ben's older brother, Daniel, got up from the other side of the couch where he had been talking to his and Ben's younger brother, Nathan, and went over to answer the front door. A few seconds later, Brooke stepped through the doorway and headed into the kitchen to go say hello to Mrs. Morgan instead of coming over to join us.

She would probably come back and join us after she had said hello to Mrs. Morgan. I saw Ryan get up to go follow her before I turned my attention back to my boyfriend, who was already staring at me.

"I can't wait until then," he said smiling at me. I smiled back at him again, happy that I was still able to get to be with him by still getting the chance at living my life, but also a little guilty that my mom wasn't too. It was probably going to be a constant thing for the rest of my life.

***

Hours later after Ben's dad had come home and updated us on what was going on, Mr. Morgan had been the last to arrive, Ben and I went off to his room to hopefully get some time alone until Ryan had decided that he couldn't stand me and Ben being alone in Ben's room anymore. Mr. Morgan had told us that the police were still trying to find my father and figure out what happened to my mother. The coroner hadn't determined quite yet what had caused my mom's death and probably wouldn't say anything until the autopsy was completed. Mr. Morgan would let us know what the coroner's conclusion is after he or she was finished. He just wasn't sure when that was going to be.

I was curious to find out how my mom had died, but I was also afraid to find out at the same time. It was mostly because I was afraid that my mom had died a painful death. That my father hadn't made it quick and easy for her. And I wanted her to have died a painless death. It was only fair that she had died peacefully since she had been the one to die and not me.

She hadn't deserved to have her life taken away when she hadn't done anything. And even if she had done something to make Dad mad at her, she still didn't deserve to die. There was no reason for her to die so I hoped that she hadn't suffered.

Since that day, I was seeing my father in a completely different way. I may not have had the best opinion of my father even before all of this had happened or that day, but I had never thought he resort to killing someone as a way to solve his problems. There were different ways to solve your problems that didn't include murder. It was hard to understand my father's reasoning behind doing this and how it had come to this. I didn't understand why he had to kill my mom when it had been me who had caused all this trouble. If anyone should be dead, it should be me.

"Babe, how are you doing?" I heard Ben say. I focused on him instead of all the thoughts running through my head. I wasn't going to waste my life when my mom couldn't live her life anymore.

"I don't know to be honest. There's so much on my mind, " I replied. Ben pulled me closer to him so that I was practically in his lap. Well now I was actually in his lap, but I didn't mind. I liked being this close to him. Both of my legs were stretched over one of his, while I leaned against his other leg that was leaning against the wall. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against his chest. I laid my head in the crook of his neck, sighing.

"Well then tell me what's on your mind. Maybe I can help," he said hugging me closer to him.

It was actually making me feel better, me being in his arms. Ben seemed to have this natural way of making me feel calm by just being there for me. I knew he probably wanted to talk to me about what happened, but he wouldn't push me if I told him I didn't want to talk about it. He'd be patient and understanding, even though he had no idea what I was going through. I could probably tell him what was on my mind even though I'm sure he wouldn't know what to say, but I knew he would try his best to make me feel better. This whole situation would be so much harder if I didn't have Ben.