A Victor's Ally - The 73rd Hunger Games (Fanfiction)

Epilogue

It had been exactly three months since my final interview. Three months since I vowed to be the perfect victor and three months since I left myself behind in Capitol. The Victory Tour would begin in a week. I closed my eyes, imagining myself standing in front of a crowd, giving my thanks to the Capitol and everything they had done for me. I expected to feel sick to my stomach, to feel some sort of emotion, but I felt nothing.

The clock on my nightstand blinked 12 AM, a result of a power outage a couple weeks ago. I hadn't felt like fixing it. I never looked at the clock anymore anyway, I lived in a daze where time didn't seem to register with me. The only reason I knew the Victory Tour was in a week was because I received a letter yesterday telling me my prep team would arrive soon.

I swung my legs over the side of my bed, quickly standing upright and ignoring the black spots that clouded my vision. Slipping silently down the stairs, I pulled my hair back away from my face. In the kitchen, my parents and Kit were sitting around the breakfast table. Their voices were low, and while I couldn't hear what they were saying, the way they stopped talking when they saw me gave me some idea of what their discussion was about. They didn't say anything to me as I walked past them; the past weeks had taught them that I wouldn't respond.

I slammed the door of my new house behind me. Across the street an identical house mirrored mine, its bright white picket fence and pale grey coloring the only noticeable difference. Luke's mom stood in the garden, carefully watering her flowers. She raised a hand in greeting, looking at me with an unreadable expression. I must have been up later than usual, because I had never seen anyone else outside when I went for my morning runs. I stiffly raised my hand in response before taking off into a jog.

The sounds of my feet pounding on the pavement cleared my mind. Each step I took forced every thought and feeling out of my body and onto the street. To my right, a beautiful expanse of golden fields stretched out as far as my eye could see. A slight breeze shifted the stalks of grain, causing them to catch and shimmer in the light of the rising sun. It reminded me of my victory dress. I ran faster.

I had no idea how long I ran for, but it quickly got hotter and hotter out, causing me to turn back. By the time I circled back to my house, the sun was high in the sky and I was damp with sweat.

My body was tired, but I was void of emotion. I felt empty. I felt nothing. And I liked it.

When I entered my house, I was slightly taken aback to find Luke in my kitchen. It had been a month since I had seen him. After we had first gotten back from the Capitol, I busied myself with moving my family into our new home. Once things had quieted down, Luke tried to visit, but he grew frustrated with my lack of response. A month ago, he stopped all together, and I thought I had finally lost him. My family urged me to go see him, but I quickly shut them out too.

These people didn't belong in my life anymore. The burden of being a victor was mine to carry alone. Kit, my parents, and even Luke, would only make things more difficult for me. I learned from the best mentor, after all.

"What are you doing here?" My voice was flat, and the question came out more like a statement.

He stood up from his seat at the table, frowning at me the whole time. A small part of me wanted to reach out, to touch his face and make him stop frowning, but I didn't even recognize that part of me anymore. The empty feeling spread further through my body and a creeping numbness entered my legs.

"Your parents let me in. Juliet, I.." The sound of his voice felt like a punch to the gut, but it quickly subsided. I stood still, and kept quiet, waiting for him to say what really brought him here.