Bonds of Mates

Ch 3

**MATURE CONTENT towards end of chapter**

Natsu pov

I chase Lucy all the way back to her apartment. Not before she makes it inside though, locking her door. I do make it just in time to her window before she has a chance to lock that too. "Go away Natsu." She says through tears. I flat refuse and tell her, "I'm not going anywhere. You're crying. I can't leave you like this without trying to help." She laughs sarcastically but steps away from the window. "This isn't something you can help me with Natsu." She stands in the middle of her room with her arms at her sides. "How do you know? You don't! Just.. talk to me! What's wrong? Is it about earlier today? I'm sorry that I snapped on you it's just that I was so.." "It's not that." She interrupts me with a sorrowful tone. I stop talking. "It's not that.. you wouldn't understand."

I feel a light growl vibrate out of my chest. "Why won't you let me help you!" "Because this time you CAN'T!!" I'm taken aback at her outburst. "You can't.. Natsu, not with this one." She folds her arms over her chest. "Try me." I challenge her. She looks at me then straightens up her stance and puts her arms down, "Okay, fine. Depending on how you answer this question? Will determine if I can talk to you about what's hurting me or not." I just nod and say, "Okay." She pauses, "Have.. have you ever had strong love for someone else? Romantic love. I'm not talking about a family member or a friend or even a guild mate. I mean romantic. love. Where you could see yourself with them the rest of your life. Getting married. Creating a family.. have you ever been in love with someone? Ever?" She stops and looks at me for an answer.

I, don't think I can answer her. Yes I've felt that kind of love for someone. For her though. But, I can't tell her that. She doesn't feel this way about me. I'm just the dense best friend who hurt her only hours ago about her getting hurt in battle. I look away from her afraid to tell her the truth but trying to think of something to say then look up to see her crying fresh tears and nodding her head. "Just go, Natsu." "Wait hang on you didn't really give me a chance to answer!" She wipes away her tears before saying, "Your lack of an answer... is answer enough." 

I grit my teeth. "Just tell me who it is! Who do you love? I'll kick their ass for making you cry." She just lightly chuckles in sarcasm, "I can't tell you that." I rub my face in frustration. "Just please go Natsu. I need to be alone right now." I run up to her and hug her. I feel her tense up as she wasn't expecting that, and feel her cry even harder into my chest without returning the hug. Damn it. I just want to hug her so tightly that I can keep her held together. Hug her pain away. I feel her gently push me away. "Please, Natsu, I can't do this right now." She rests her hands on my chest. Without looking at me she says, "You can come back later to check on me if you want to. But now? I need to be alone." She turns away from me leaving me feeling cold, which is odd for me, and goes to her bathroom door. She rests her hand on the door way and without turning to face me says, "Please, don't be here by the time I get out of this bathroom." And closes the door.

I hesitate for the longest time. Not wanting to leave things the way they are. It doesn't feel right leaving her like this. It feels so wrong. Why couldn't I just tell her? Why? I can face the biggest most horrific of monsters and demons, take down the darkest guilds, hell even beat Zeref to a bloody pulp defeating him, but telling Lucy how I really feel? Tell her the truth? It terrified me. Why though?? I finally removed myself from my spot and hop into her window. Glancing at the bathroom door once more and jump down and glumly walk to the guild. I don't even notice I've already reached the guild when I hear a soft thump hit the ground. I come out of my daze and see it's Levy. "Jeeze Natsu, got your head in the clouds or something?" I reach out to her to help her up, "Sorry Levy.. I have a few things on my mind..." She stands up and dusts herself, "I get that I'm small but you still should watch where you're.." She looks up at me and sees how lost in my own thoughts I am, "..going. Natsu? Everything okay?"