Awaking The Shadows

Chapter 24

Depressed

My nerves were going haywire as the taxi got closer and closer to home. Finally we turned on my street and the taxi driver helped me out. I wish Molly was with me but once we left New York, we all got on separate planes home. Good bye was harder than I thought but we said we would have reunions every 6 months at Ana's in Montana. I walked up and mom came out with open arms and tears in her eyes. She hugged me softly to not hurt my side but I still flinched."I'm so glad your home" she smiled. I walked in and little red was the first to hug me and she hugged me hard. She was taller and looked a bit older. She was 8 now, 6 when I left.  Before I had left Scarlett's birthday was a month away. I had to catch up for the year I had missed. Adam came and embraced me. As I walked into the living room I saw grandma lana. She gave me a kiss on the cheek and when I turned around I saw Jenna and I couldn't help but return the smile. "I'm so happy your home!" She yelled. I giggled. "Me too" said a voice. I looked up and saw Daniel smiling. He got more handsome and a little taller. "Hi Daniel" "Hi claire" he took me in a swift hug and his warmth melted me. He smelled of cologne and after shave. "Alright well let's eat" said mom. Always eager to start eating. We all sat down and talked about life and Scarlett caught me up at her latest at school. Adam was enrolled in college and was recruited in the army. Jenna had a boyfriend of 8 months, a boy named Nicholas. Mom got a new job at a insurance company and pays a lot better. Daniel was the same. Nothing had changed about him. He had a job and was expected to start school next semester but he was still the same Daniel to me. I liked that.

"Bye thanks for coming" I waved at grandma. I shut the door and only I and my family remained. Scarlett was already asleep and Adam was fixing his new motorcycle. Mom was washing dishes. "I think I'm gonna go to bed already" I said. "Okay, I left your room just as you left it" she said. I hadn't dared walked in my room since I got here. I opened the door slowly. She was right, nothing had been touched. I changed into pajamas and tucked myself in bed. I let my mind wander....

"Come back, Tommy" I said. His hand was slowly being pulled away from mine. "Please!!! Don't go!!" I yelled. "Than come with me" he said softly. "How?" I said. "You know how...." He drifted away.

I know how. I woke up. It was 10 o'clock. I got up and looked in the mirror my eyes looked dark and purple. I looked pale and thin. I had changed completely and no one said anything last night. I was this ugly and Daniel still looked at me like I was the prettiest girl alive. I pulled on a black hoodie and sweat pants. I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth.

Days began to mold together, I could no longer remember if it was Monday or Wednesday. Night after night I dreamt about Tommy and being reunited with him. I ate little in the morning, my mom would ask what I ate for lunch and I would lie. I don't even remember when I actually ate. The wound was healing but the pain felt fresh. "Claire?" Mom walked in."Claire, you look awful" she came to my side. I shifted to the mirror and saw my face but than it didn't look like my face. I was even paler than before and my eyes were swollen and red and my jaw line was showing like I was a Skelton. "Something isn't right" she said. "We need to go to the hospital" "No, no more drugs, no more death" I said. "Honey look at the way your talking" she said. "I'm fine" I looked away. "I'm gonna call the family doctor" she got up and went to the kitchen. "I'm so stupid!" I said to myself. I grabbed my painted rock and through it at the mirror. It shattered. "Claire?!" Yelled my mom. I ran and locked the door. She began to bang on the door. "Claire let me in this instant!!" "Go away...." I said. I got up and looked at the broken glass on the floor and picked up a piece. "I know how...." I said. I pulled up my sleeve and turned to see my pale wrist. "I don't want to live without him, mom" I said. "Without who?" She said. "Tommy. I can't live in a world where he doesn't exist" I said. "Claire if you're thinking what I think you are, please don't do it" "I have to" I said. I put the pointed edge down on my wrist and slit it. It made a scratch noise that I think my mom heard. "Claire!!!" She yelled. "Adam!! Come quickly" he had come home. But I was focused on the blood dripping from my wrist and laid against my bed. "Claire?!!!" It was Adam and he banged and banged on the door. I began to feel woozy and my eyesight began to blur and I say Tommy looking at me."Come to me, baby" he said. "I am" I smiled. The door busted down and Adam ran to my side. "Claire?!" "Your too late" i slurred and blacked out.