the back-up plan

chapter 1.

briar pov
i can't believe i didn't get a pedicure for this, how embarrassing. i sighed internally, looking down at my foot. look at that, if i were with a real guy doing this i would've got a pedicure. and a wax. my eyes moved from one foot to the other. oh shit! that one's worse.

"sorry i didn't get a pedicure," i said softly to the doctor. "what?" he said, lifting his head up to look at me, the flashlight he had strapped to his head blinding me. i squinted, "uh.. my toes. i'm sorry." "i'm not looking at your toes, i'm looking at your cervix," he replied with a chuckle before returning to what he was doing. "right.. now i kinda wish you were looking at my toes," i admitted, laying my head back against the chair.

at that moment i was getting artificially inseminated. that's when you get pregnant from a sperm donor. the doctor inserts it and hopefully it works.

"all done," he said with a smile as he stood up from his seat. "that's it?" "we'll elevate your legs for ten minutes and you'll be good to go." he pressed his foot down on a pedal that elevated my chair back, leaving my legs in the air. "oh i'm totally freaking out!" i sat up slightly, looking at him worriedly. "oh come on, everything's gonna be great! i have a feeling that you and uh.." he paused as he picked up the empty tube that the.. donor's donation had been stored in and read the label, "crm 1014 are going to make beautiful babies together."

"thank you," i said as he walked out of the room. i lifted my legs up off of the leg rests and held them up higher. then my thoughts flooded back. oh god i hope this works. i've wanted this for so long. maybe this isn't how i pictured it exactly.. i thought i'd have a little more support. that's when i remembered the conversation i had had with my best friend, jessy, a few months ago.

"no! you don't want kids, trust me," she said while preparing a chicken for her family's dinner. i rolled my eyes slightly, "well that's easy for you to say, you have four." "and it's awful," she fake cried, yet it was drowned out by the sound of screaming gradually coming closer, "they've ruined my life!" her attention was put on the four kids that had run into the kitchen to join us, "'what? no! go away!" she yelled at them then looked at me, "have you seen my vagina? i mean, have you? because i will show it to you. i will show it to you just to prove that you don't wanna have kids. i will show you my vagina!" she continued casually, taking the basket of clothes from the table and walking into the living room.
"i don't wanna see that, i just wanna have a baby," i followed closely behind her. "i just think you're tired of being alone, you haven't met the right guy.." i cut her off at the mention, "it's not about a guy! this isn't about a guy. i've dated hundreds of guys over the past five years and not one of them is close to being the one. it's just not happening for me." "yeah but that doesn't mean that it won't- hey! is that my chicken? she yelled, following her son as he ran across the room holding it on top of his head, "what are you doing? that is your dinner! not a toy!" she took a deep breath, looking back at me, "i hate them. do you smell pee?"

so i had to figure it out on my own. i examined every possibility and arrived at the most logical conclusion.

"will you be my baby daddy?" i said hopefully, looking at my best friend noah as we sat in a restaurant. instantly he spat out his drink, "what?! no, i can't be the father. are you out of your mind? what are you talking about? no, no. i am in my sexual prime, alright? i have countless more women to take to bed before i do something as idiotic as having a baby." "noahhhh, you're my friend. don't you wanna help me?" i gave him a sad look, hoping he would change his mind, "i mean, we don't have to have sex. you don't have to be involved at all, alright? just give me your sperm." "oh, okay you're feeling lonely. maybe a little dead down there, i get it. i get it. it's been a long time since you've had.. uh you know," he laughed, making my anger rise, "just shut up! okay! just forget it. forget the whole thing."

well that was a bust. so i took life by the horns and i did what i had to do. yeah. it's gonna be okay. i have a plan. just then the timer went off, making me smile to myself. "ding," i repeated happily.